TCR Season 3 Episode 21

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Not-Heroes Return[edit | edit source]

-back in the hallway where Travis was during the call lore-
Nier
...It’s safe! Get in!
Dimitri
None of that otherworldly stench in the air… Yes, we’re back.
Travis
Hah… told you all… We’ll be back home, safe and sound.
Lain
You seem out of breath… Travis, is everything okay?
Travis
Yeah, yeah… just tired. Haven’t had to exert myself like that in a while. Why did you tell us to run, Nier? Just tensed for a second, and told us all to sprint to the door.
Nier
I felt the wind starting to pick up. Doubt that it signified anything good in that hellish place.
Travis
Yeah, fair… Wait, you hear this? Someone’s running…
Lain
It’s-
-shift to angela and co in the hallway, all are present from start-
Angela
T-Travis? Lain?!
Travis
Hey, guys. What’s up? You look like… you’ve seen a ghost.
-Put text over respective characters head instead of textbox-
Angela
I-I thought-
Tsubasa
But you said Lain was d-dead!
Alice
Hora, was that a joke after all?!
Luka
We were very worried!
Tidus
Nah, but you’re as pale as one.
Wakka
Brudda, you feelin’ fine?
Travis
Whoa, hey, one at a time!
Angela
You made it out of there? We thought you were walking into a trap. How is… How is Lain alive? You said it yourself, her head was on your bed.
Travis
You’re right about the trap… Lain was kidnapped by my brother, Henry. He faked her death with paper mache. Why he did that, other than to fight me, no fucking clue.

He was waiting for me at my former home, in Santa Destroy.

We fought…I lost. Henry’s cronies overwhelmed Dimitri and Nier, they and Lain were brought to us. That fucker wanted me to choose who dies first.

He was about to kill Lain, but then… I heard a warm voice in my head.

Some woman in a labcoat spoke to me, and waxed on about how much of a failure I was. Taunted me with their deaths. I couldn’t let that stand.

I refuted her words, and somehow, I got a surge of power from that.

Killed my bro and flew us all away from there. And that’s that, pretty much.
Angela
I see… By that surge of power, you mean-
Travis
Yeah, hold on, let me show you, it’s pretty cool.
Lain
Travis, wai-
Travis
HENSHIN!
-travis transforms, start with hands on hips pose, then to tired pose-
Travis
So… how… does it… look…
-Travis detransforms and falls to the floor-
Lain and Angela
TRAVIS!

Obligation to Despair[edit | edit source]

OPkuma
GnOPkuma
Well, they definitely haven’t eaten them. I’ve even gutted some of these things open to check!
OPkuma
GnOPkuma
Yeah, I’ll make sure to save their hearts, they’ll go well in the stew.
OPkuma
…They’re gone.
GnOPkuma
Gone? The bodies are still fresh, they can’t have gone far. We can easily pick them back up.
OPkuma
No, they’re gone. There’s no way we’re gonna take them back.
GnOPkuma
Stop being goddamn dramatic, we’ll just pick them up and off them at the ritual site.
OPkuma
No! No! Look you retard! They’ve run off! Can’t you see that!?
GnOPkuma
… Fuck, you’re right, their trail leads out, they had the guts to ran off! Shit!!
OPkuma
…I want everything after them.
GnOPkuma
Everything?
OPKuma
EVERYTHING! The Spear! Whatever dipshit cultists that are alive!
GnOPkuma
Are you being fuckin’ stupid? You’ve forgotten that The Spear got broken and the cult has been wiped out clean?!
OPkuma
Then get anything! Whatever the fuck you can find! Tell all the goddamn mindless husks around here that there is something to kill! There’s no point in it now! No way in hell we’re gonna take them back alive, we’ll just kill them and wait for another batch!
GnOPkuma
What about the fuckin superhero movie addict? He’s got nothing better to do now.
OPkuma
Except him, he’s busy with the hostages. Which gives us the time that we need.
GnOPkuma
Yeeeeah… About that…
OPkuma
…What?
GnOPkuma
The trap didn’t work, the guy he tried to lure out brought friends.

Guy tried to fight one on one, lost the fight like a bitch…

Then he went fucking nutso, turned into a power ranger and sliced a double in half before bailing out with the girl in tow.
OPkuma
What do you mean he turned into a power ranger?
GnOPkuma
I dunno, he just had a mental breakdown and then transformed or something, he looked goofy as all hell.
OPkuma
…It’s that bitch… She must’ve had a hand in that! Her and that fuckin’ old man!
GnOPkuma
But I thought we fucked with her last one, doesn’t that shit she does end up causing more problems than help?
OPkuma
...Not this time… That fuckin’ bitch! This is a disaster! I’m surrounded by idiots! Morons! You!
GnOPkuma
You're blaming me?
OPkuma
Bet your stuffed ass I am! We wouldn’t be in this mess if it wasn’t for your madness!
GnOPkuma
You wanna play the blame game, huh? How about you blame yourself! You left me unattended, despite knowing what the resurrection does to my mind!
OPkuma
Is this our master’s reward for believing in his plan? For expecting a damn invalid like you to muster up some sense once in a while?
GnOPkuma
I’m just gonna go and find those idiots before some husk gets to them before I do! You can fuckin’ wallow in your misery for all I give a shit.
-GnOPkuma leaves-
OPkuma
…I don’t care if they die… As long as they suffer. Suffer like I have had to suffer them. They will taste my despair… If it’s the last thing I will ever do.
-black screen-
OPKuma
They will die.

Opening Match[edit | edit source]

  1. Dallas
  2. Tadano Hitonari
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • KO

Tadano Hitonari Winner

Here Be Monsters[edit | edit source]

El Loco
Hey Boris. See anything?
Dyatlov
Why must we keep looking? We need to get moving!
El Loco
I think that is commie speak for “Nothing, the coast is clear.”
James
Right… We can’t wait any longer. We’ll just have to take the risk now.
-Walking in the field-
George
I can’t believe we’re escaping…
Midge
I dunno, gettin’ outta this shite hole is more likely than you stickin’ to a diet.
George
Now that’s just uncalled for.
Travelling Knight
Why is it that men of small stature always think they are above others?
Midge
Bully? I’m the fackin’ victim here! I didn’t bloody choose to be like this!
El Loco
Shut the fuck up before I-
-sound of growling, music goes silent-
El Loco
Wait… You hear that?
James
Yes.. what is it?
Soldier
A KRAUT PARATROOPER MUST BE HIDING IN THE TREES!
Jon
Quiet!
-They stop for a while-
El Loco
…Move.
-they keep moving-
Naegi
Move?
Quint
THE BRITISH ARE COMING! WE MUST INFORM THE PATRIOTS!
Gamer Wizard
MY MAGIC GAMER SENSE CAN FEEL THE DANGER WE ARE IN! THERE COULD BE WOMEN ANYWHERE!
James
Keep going. Slowly.
Dyatlov
Everything is fine… everything is fine…
-monsters growling-
Dyatlov
Everything is not fine…
El Loco
Hide!
-They hide behind the van-
El Loco
…Shit.
Midge
The fack is that?
El Loco
Either it’s a crackhead looking for a fix, or a fuckin’ monster.
George
It’s definitely a monster.
Dyatlov
No shit!
Travelling Knight
‘Tis only a single demon. We easily outnumber it. We should fight it!
-More figures appear, growling begins again-
El Loco
Had to fuckin’ jinx us…
-more appear-
El Loco
James, Naegi. Get your crews and yourselves down that tunnel now.
James
But-
El Loco
Just fuckin’ do it. We chose to be the bait, we’ll be the bait. Get down there now.
James
Right… you’re right. Just do not do anything stupid, El Loco.
Naegi
Please, you must live…
El Loco
Can’t make any promises there, but I’ll make sure they gotta work for this.
-Niggy and James leave-
George
So… This is it? We’re going to be playing chicken with these things?
El Loco
Yup… Let’s put on a good show for them.

…HEY! FUCKFACE! YOU WANNA EAT SOME FUCKING CHILLI? I GOT A BIG FAT ONE YOU CAN SUCK RIGHT HERE!

COME AND GET IT!
George
Woah!
Dyatlov
Cyka blyat, what the hell is wrong with you!?
Midge
Are you seriously showing them your fackin’ knob?
Travelling Knight
Well it’s getting their attention! Those devil’s eyes are getting closer.
El Loco
Now we run!
-Cut to running sequence-
Midge
Well we got their pissin’ attention! Now what!?
El Loco
Well… I kinda didn’t think that part through…
Dyatlov
You don’t have a plan!
Travelling Knight
If only we had horses, we could easily have escaped.
George
How… How… How long do we have to… have to keep running?!
El Loco
First thing we see, we’ll fuckin’ take the chance! Just keep fuckin’ running!
-the group stumbles onto the truck-
El Loco
(There’s the truck we fucked up trying to hotwire near here… Better than nothing)

Hey… Said you wanted horses, eh Knight? Well I guess we’ll have to settle with a mule!

I’ll drive! Get fats in the back now!
George
Why do I have to be in the-
El Loco
Get the fuck in!
-Cut to truck interior-
Dyatlov
I hope you know how to get these working without keys!
El Loco
Sure… I hope… It’s been a while. (That potion selling fuck better not have screwed the wires that badly…)
Dyatlov
Hurry… They’re getting closer!
Midge
We’re well and truly buggered, aren’t we?
El Loco
Your bitching and moaning isn’t helping matters! Just gimme a few minutes here!
Dyatlov
We haven’t got a few minutes!
El Loco
Grargh! If only these fuckin idiots left their keys!
Travelling Knight
Bandito, I see a set of keys dangling above you.
El Loco
What? …Holy shit!

(They were there this entire fuckin’ time?!)

Well that speeds shit up!
-sound of engine trying to start up-
El Loco
Come on…
Dyatlov
They’re outside the truck! We need to go now!
-Engine starts-
El Loco
Hahahaha! HAHAHAHAH! Yes!
Travelling Knight
Our steed awakens! Go forth! Let’s take these malevolent creatures away from the others!
El Loco
Strap in boys, we’re goin for a joy ride!
-Fade to black-
-sound of truck accelerating-

EE-01: The Chase[edit | edit source]

[RPG]

Take Yer Damn Job Off[edit | edit source]

  1. Kenshiro
  2. Thresher
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • Extreme Rules

Kenshiro Winner

A Strange Dream, A Strange Dreamer[edit | edit source]

Girl

Where… Am I? I must… Must document it. Need to document it. It needs witnesses.

…Place is covered in fog, in fact I don’t recognise this place at all. Looks like some old European castle-…

European? But how did I get to- No! Don’t think about it! Just make sure it’s recorded!

But I need it! Where is it!? My second pair of eyes… Where did I leave-
-Girl finds camera on floor-
Girl
My camcorder! There you are! You still work! Yes yes yes yes… There is still a chance!
-distant footstep noises-
Girl
Sh-shit! Someone is here!!
-girl hides-
-enter a bremen soldier in full black silhouette
???
-soldier leaves, girl appears back on screen after a couple seconds-
Girl
What- No, who even was that? Though, no, I don’t want to know.

Dammit… Why is this place so familiar? Was I here with the others? Or did they find me here…

Saya! Alice! Ib! Anyone?! Where is everyone?! Where did you go-?! (Start a ringing noise, white fade around edges and such)

Nggghhh!!! My head!!

I need to remember! Something! Anythi-

Arghh! The burning! It won’t stop!
-cut to her showing her moonscorched arm-
Girl
Gah, these goddamn monsters! Come on, there’s gotta be a purpose… A reason for this vile curse!
-girl turns to face tower-
Girl
You… You… I know you. You did this… It had to have been you… You call for me… And I will answer the call.
-door opening effect that goes to white-
-back to reality, girl suddenly gets up-
Girl
Burning! It fucking burns! It hurts! It-! Ah! Hah… Grargh… It was just…
Alice
…Another nightmare?
Girl
…Yes… it was that… Just a nightmare. But It felt way too real, I… I don’t know how to explain.
Alice
You really need to stop screaming every time you wake up. You almost woke up Ib.
Girl
…Sorry, but I can’t help myself. The fire hurts so much, more than the pains from my finger.

But I know one thing for certain, there’s something terrible out there! It’s what caused this burn!

I know that the truth is out there! M-Maybe iI’ll find it...
Saya
Ah, Miss, you’re finally awake!
Girl
Oh… Saya, I was wondering where you were… I thought you ran away when those freaks caught us.
Saya
They found me and put me in this fight with you guys, I dunno why they’d do something like that!
Girl
You and me both. Why did they take us out of that closet and make us fight?
Alice
Maybe they find a bit of sport in making outcasts fight each other for their entertainment? I do wonder where we are though, this room feels like the ones back home.
Saya
Don’t tell anyone else that I did this, Miss. But I managed to sneak out of the room. And I made you this little patch out of leather! It could hide that big hole in your jacket!
Girl
Oh, uh thank you… You really didn’t have to… Is this really leather? Doesn’t feel like the leather I’m used to.
Saya
Yes, it’s leather. Maybe your sense of feeling is still numb from those pills they made us take.
Girl
Maybe so… but thanks anyway. I’ll make sure to stitch it on when I can sneak in a needle and thread.
Saya
Thank you, Miss!
Girl
So… What happened after the… the fighting thing they got us doing? I can’t remember anything.
Alice
If I recall correctly, you got into a fight with some pale man wearing an extravagant outfit when they had come to collect us. After that, all I can remember was falling into a deep sleep.
Girl
Well I hope I got the glowie who tried to kidnap me in the balls before I went down.
Alice
You really enjoy getting yourself into trouble, Girl.
Girl
Trouble finds me! Just because I refuse to be a fuckin’ victim, Alice, it doesn’t mean that I seek it out!
Alice
Yet you couldn’t give a tinker’s cuss about how your antics drags us into your mess!
Girl
Oh shut up, as if you’re any fucking better. Maybe you should get off your high horse once in a while, Little Miss Stuck Up Bitc-!
-Ib stands up-
Ib
…?!
Girl
Oh… hey Ib.
Saya
Hey Ib! Did you have a good dream today?
Ib
Alice
…We’ll continue this discussion later. Right now, our captor seems ready to send us onto another fight.
Ib

Hostess Club Basics[edit | edit source]

Akiyama
...Well, that should be everything sorted out then.
Soma
What do you mean?
Akiyama
Had to make sure we were fit to even run a Hostess Club around these parts.

The law enforcement here seems pretty suspicious of foreigners opening up things like this around here.

They think a Hostess Club’s no different from a brothel.
Soma
Can’t really blame them for thinking that, especially after I Corp was effectively doing just that.
Akiyama
Yeah, guess you’re right. But it’s still a pain in the ass. Took some real convincing to make these guys give us the greenlight. I had to give them the whole sobstory about all the Idols being out of a job with I Corp going under.
Soma
That's all it took to make them budge?
Akiyama
Nah, I had to bribe them too.. Can't go anywhere these days without a briefcase of cash...
Soma
Seems like you're made out of money. Is that how you got a hold of a place like this in such short time?
Akiyama
I've had it for a while, actually.

Got it cheap from some old Italian dude a while back, one of those superstitious types who believe in curses and that.

I've just been using this as a personal karaoke bar ever since, but it's really come in handy now.
-Ringabel runs in-
Ringabel
Phew... I did not expect those boxes... of ladies clothing... to weigh… so much!
Soma
It could've been worse... Do you know how hard it was to round up all these Idols here? I still have no idea where that mouthy one even went. For all we know, she’s probably on her way to the nearest bridge-
Ringabel
Soma!
Soma
Yeah. yeah… It just makes me wonder how they could even manage such dysfunctional girls...
Ringabel
It is our responsibility to keep these maidens safe, Soma. We have already lost one. I will make sure we do not lose another.
Akiyama
Yeah, better to have them here than out somewhere on the street. Who knows where they could’ve ended up. Anyways, Is there any way I can repay you two for helping out on such short notice?
Soma
Forget it, we're even now after beating you up and well... the whole kicking down your door thing.
Akiyama
Man, that door didn’t even cost me anything to replace. You gotta have something you want.
Ringabel
The experience was the payment! It was a pleasure to help out.
Akiyama
Nah, I can't leave it at that...

...I got it!

How about all three of us manage this place? You guys have put in just as much effort as I did to get it up and running.

And besides, the Idols here love you two! They'd be happy to know you guys are a part of the business.
Soma
...Maybe a little too much, they nearly raped-.
Ringabel
Well I like the sound of that! What do you say, Soma?
Soma
Y’know we still have the invest-
Akiyama
It's settled then! Welcome to the team.
-Cut to show the Akiyama Cardboard again-
Ringabel
Oh yes, I have been meaning to ask! Mr. Akiyama, what is the purpose of that very odd looking totem?
Akiyama
That's no totem, that's the mascot of this place! Isn't he great? I designed it myself!
Soma
...Why’s a chunk ripped out of it?
Akiyama
That's just how I found it when I bought this place, I think my renovation of it turned out pretty good, though!
Soma
...Do you really think this is gonna appeal to-
Idol
Oh. My. Gosh! He is so cute!! Can I take a picture with him!? Please!?
Akiyama
Of course! Go right ahead!
-Have the blue cat ears Idol from the E18.5 lore appear next to it, add a white flash and camera sound and then it cuts back to normal lore style-
Akiyama
Well, with that all settled, I think we're just about open for business.
Soma
"Just about"? We need to get going soon before Sundowner realises we are late.
Akiyama
How about a quick lesson in the basics of running a Hostess Club. We can start with advertising! Can't run a business without customers after all.
Ringabel
How are we going to do that?
Akiyama
I want you to call a friend of mine. If you can win him over, you've practically won over the world.
Soma
This sounds... exaggerated. I think we should seriously get back to-
Akiyama
I promise you it isn't! Here's his number, give it a shot. Tell him you're a friend of mine, that should make it easier.
Ringabel
Alright...
-Phone ringing sound, then Phone pickup sound
-Do camera split screen with Date on the right side-
Date
Hello? Date speaking.
Ringabel
How do you do?
Date
I'm doing alright... How did you get my number?
Ringabel
My friend Mr. Akiyama told me to call you. You see, we've just opened a brand new Hostess Club known as Vagrant Of Love

Our reservoir of maiden's come from a now out of business "Idol Corporation" that was holding these ladies captive!

They were attempting to use them for some sort of draining ritual to rid them of their fluids!
Soma
That's not exactly what it was, Ringabel... -Small Text-
Date
I see... I like a good backstory! So what inspired you guys to make this hostess club?
Ringabel
After freeing those captive maidens, they were left with nowhere to go! I could not bear to leave them stranded after having just saved them!
Date
...And you said you're friends with Akiyama?
Ringabel
That is correct, yes.
-Small text to imply they're away from the phone-
-Backfacing sprite of Date-
Date
...It's been a while since I got to relax, y'know... -Small Text-
Aiba
Now's not the time to be going on vacation, Date. -Small Text w/ pink color-
Date
C'mon! Doesn't this count as a... business trip? -Small Text-
Aiba
... -Small Text-
Date
...Fine... -Small Text-
-Date turns back to face the camera-
Date
Well, I'm sorry to say this but I don't think I'll be able to show up...

I have some responsibilities to take care of.

Things are a little crazy around here after everything that happened...
Ringabel
Hmm, I understand. I'm sorry for asking on such short notice.
Date
Hey, no need to apologise. I think I can still help out with something.
Ringabel
What's that?
Date
I'll let my forum know the place is open! I know some guys in your area might get a kick out of it.
Ringabel
...Your forum...?
Date
Huh? You don't know about 'LonelyGuysWithExpendableCash.net'?

We've got guys all over the world discussing their findings!

There's an "1800s Girls" subcategory I browse but I'm far more interested in how they look today...
Ringabel
Right...
Date
Well I've got things to do. But thanks a lot for calling me about this. Any friend of Akiyama is a friend of mine, good luck with your business endeavours!
Ringabel
The pleasures all mine, take care.
-Hangup sound-
Akiyama
How'd it go?
Ringabel
He said he cannot make it but will inform his forum clique of our business.
Akiyama
That's great news then! Just what I was hoping.
Soma
What does that get us?
Akiyama
Oh you don't know about the forum? You seemed like the type of guy to use it.
Soma
… I think we really need to get going now-
Akiyama
Anyways It's called 'Lonely Guys with Expendable Cash' or something to that extent.

It's really popular with a specific crowd of guys.

They're always there to help fledgling clubs get off the ground.

If you've got girls worth coming back for, they'll show up every single day!
Ringabel
Do you have history with them, Mr. Akiyama?
Akiyama
A little. You can't be successful in this business if you don't.
Soma
It’s been nice learning this uh… business venture? But we’ve really gotta get going.
Akiyama
Where are you off to?
Ringabel
Ah yes, I forgot. The investigation is likely wondering where we have been.
Soma
Yeah, we've been gone for a good while. I hope we're not late to anything.
Akiyama
Hey, It's been a fun couple of days with you bunch. I haven't had this much fun in a long time. I don't know if I ever would've remembered to deal with I Corp if you guys never beat me senseless!
Ringabel
It all turned out okay in the end, did it not?
Soma
Yeah, Let's just hope that actually stays true.
Akiyama
I think the three of us made a pretty good trio! I hope one day we can all wrestle as a team! Y’know I've been eyeing those K.O. Belts...
Soma
Maybe someday we’ll be able to take you up on that offer.
Akiyama
...
Ringabel
...
Soma
Well… It’s time to go now, c’mon, Ringabel.
Ringabel
Please keep those maidens safe for me, Mr. Akiyama!
Akiyama
I will, don't worry. And, Thanks again, for everything.
-Soma and Ringabel leave-
-Cut to outside, sunset probably-
Soma
Let's go meetup with the others, who knows how long they’ve been waiting for us.
Ringabel
Right... Let us go.

Sex & Violence[edit | edit source]

  1. Ugly Bastard (1)
  2. Hank (2)
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • 2/3 Falls

Hank Winner

Luis' Discovery[edit | edit source]

Luis
Well now, that’s a good batch of samples coming through. How’s work on your end, Eggman?
Eggman
Ah, it’s terrrrrrrrrrrriffic, my dear frrrriend! Weapons made by my design shall be used forrrrrrrr the invasion of the Otherrrrrrrside!
Luis
Splendid, those should give an edge against whatever monstrosities are wandering there. Do you think they’ll bring back some corpses, for samples and whatnot?
Eggman
Don’t worrrrrry about that! L Corrrrrrp plan on taking some alive, even!
Luis
Excellent. The more we know about their biology, the easier it will be to deal with them in the future.

Now… Hm, take a look at this lady’s sample. The one who recently freaked out in front of Spigot.

The Agents noted down a particularly strange burn on her arm and provided samples from there too.

DNA… Seems to be altered to some degree, but it’s stable otherwise.

Hm. By all means, that part of the body should be completely foreign, but there are no signs of rejection. Odd.

Seems to be a human… But, keep an eye out for her, I’d say.

Speaking of, this wrestler’s sample seems very… Odd. Even more so than the girl’s.
Eggman
What about it?
-image from one of gno's weird shit, i have no idea what the fuck it is, Nyron-
Luis
Take a look at this stained gel run, I left gaps between the ladders.

On this other lane is a sample from… Kuze, I think. You can see that it’s picking up something that exists in humans, like you and I.

But here? In this lane? Nothing at all.
Eggman
Don’t we have plenty of odd ones rrrrrecorrrrrrded?
Luis
True, true. In fact, some people have missing records. Namely Alice and Luka.
-Image of some bullshit, i am not a fucking nerd-
Luis
Ah! Look in the electron microscope, I believe I’m onto something.
Eggman
What am I supposed to see here?  I’m an engineerrrrrr, not a biologist, rrrrememberrrrrr?
Luis
Right, right.

These look like tumors - cancer cells. But, at the same time, they’re not. The way they divide and multiply differs greatly.

As for DNA… I don’t even know where to start. Never seen anything like this in a human… No, in anything else, really.

The way they rapidly pack together is similar to a muscle. And that’s a lot of tiny muscles… Man, this is so alien.

Hm. Let me take the microscope for now, let’s see how it reacts to introducing foreign cells into the environment.

Some of this, a bit of that… Oh, and grab high hazard suits, we’re taking this into the high risk area.
======[edit | edit source]
Luis
Alright, is the camera on?
Eggman
Go forrrrrrrr it!
Luis
Audio log’s running too, good...
-Imagine if someone leaked documents to nuclear weapons on a wrestling stream?-

Okay, continuing the documentation of the specimen, I’ve decided to observe how it would react to foreign human cells added into the equation.

Cells provided from myself, Luis Sera, that is.
-I have no idea-
Luis
Diffusing through the media…
-still have no idea-
Luis
Alright. The specimen’s cells seem to be moving towards the foreign ones and- What the-!?
-glass shattering noise-
Luis
¡Joder! Damn thing!

Get the solution in that container over there, it should kill anything biological.

I’ll put anything solid through an autoclave cycle. If it’s on the level of anthrax or lower, it’ll be dead too.

Mierda… Just what the hell was that?

I’ll report it to my colleagues, those cells acted much too rabid from such a tiny infusion…

Eggman, wrap it up! The sooner they’ll know, the better.

I want to interview that nameless lady. The other one? I have a bad feeling… Some caution would be necessary I think.

The Return of Tables[edit | edit source]

  1. Hugh Neutron
  2. Jetstream Sam
  3. Spigot
  4. Rapeman
  5. Yugi Moto
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • Elimination
  • Tables

Elimination By
Spigot Yugi Moto
Rapeman Jetstream Sam
Yugi Moto Hugh Neutron
Jetstream Sam
Hugh Neutron Winner

Standby for Occult War[edit | edit source]

-In car interior-
Norman
…We’re seriously going to another church? I figured that cult would’ve been wiped out by now.
Cole
This one was cleared shortly after the Jane Doe informant provided locations. This place is where the staging ground of our rescue is getting established.
Axel
At least we weren’t late for the popping of the cork, imagine the hell we would’ve been in had we drank this time around…
Norman
I have to admit that was a good night though… If I could remember what even happened back there.
Axel
I swear those drinks were spiked… Say, you worked homicide, and Norman is FBI, so you both know more about criminal psychology than I do. So lemme ask you something.
Norman
What is it?
Axel
So these things we’re dealing with are plain evil, no doubt about that. So who the hell would willingly go and associate with these things?
Norman
Could be many factors, mental illness especially. Schizophrenia, paranoid delusions, Narcissistic personality disorder….
Cole
Or people who have a thing for power over others, that or lashing out for injustices done to them, perceived or otherwise. Or they are some sick twisted degenerate boy fuckers.
Axel
…I guess you could say some people are just bad to the bone…
Cole
Perhaps, but they easily could be just fools believing they can control the uncontrollable. Maybe when this is all over and the wrestlers are back safe and sound, we can look into it further.
Axel
Assuming that they’re alive by the time we find-
-QTE appears-
-QTE fails-
-Car spins out lmao-
Axel
What the fu-!?
Cole
Sonuva bitch!
Axel
Where the hell did you learn to drive?!
Norman
Sorry! The brakes… They locked- they must’ve locked up or something!
Axel
I thought the FBI gets the best cars, not rust buckets with over 200k in mileage!
Cole
Next time, I’ll take the wheel…
-cut to Haru and Akasaka outside the church-
Akasaka
War, something I’d never expect to be involved in again after that thing with Angela. I just don’t get why we’re doing it here and not at some random field. At the very least we could keep this away from civilization.
Haru
When you’re fuckin’ around with the occult, boss, ya gotta play by it’s rules.

Demons, devils, whatever the fuck those things down there are called, they love places of faith.

Makes a nice place for them to wipe their ass with holy texts and piss on all that is considered sacred.

It’s like the lighthouse back home in a way, it’s a big shining beacon to whatever fucked up thing they want the attention of.
Akasaka
I know, Haru. it’s just that I thought this kind of mess would have stayed at Shiokawa.
Haru
Hey, we’re prepared for it this time, boss. At least we won't have someone going solo, like Mizuki did.
Akasaka
I’m surprised you’re willing to talk about her, Haru.
Haru
…She was all dead set on it, Boss. No point blaming myself for her goin’ all Lady Snowblood.

The least we can hope for is that she died before the cult got dragged down into that hell pit at the lighthouse…

After all, death’s a fuckin’ mercy compared to what these fuckin things can do if they get their hands on you.

…Hmph, let’s get this over with.
-Cut to interior of church, Bateman is listening to music smugly while Roland talks to Hokma-
Roland
…Look, if Travis is down there, no doubt he’ll get caught in the crossfire. And it’s bad enough that Angela has been constantly sneaking down there with the others trying to find him.
Hokma
We are aware of the situation with Travis, Roland. But there is no confirmation that Travis has even gone down to the Otherside.
Roland
He told Angela himself that he’s going down there, what more do you want? And he’s nowhere to be found, neither is Dimitri and Nier! He had to have gone down there.
Hokma
Unlikely, any entrances to the Otherside that have been found have patrols guarding them. Travis may be a friend of The King, but he hasn’t got access nor the knowledge to any facilities related to our operations here. Had he tried, he would have been caught already.
Roland
And what if there is a new opening we haven’t had the chance to find yet?
Hokma
Within the timespan of Travis going missing, there’s been no reports of new openings.
Roland
Well there had to have been, the guy left him a damn note! I’m no idiot Hokma-
Bateman
Could’ve fooled me.
Roland
…I know a hostage situation when I see one.

The last thing we need is to be giving these goddamn things more people to toy with!

They killed Lain, they taunted Travis with that fact, and you’re not worried that they might be targeting others?

It would be like what happened with Angela and Tsubasa at that karaoke bar! But this time we won’t be there to save them!
Bateman
‘We’? Since when did you start taking credit for saving Angela and her ditzy popstar friend?

I got their ass out of that mess, not you.

Never even got a goddamn thank you from you for that-
Roland
How about “Fuck you”? Will that suffice?
Bateman
Oh, I’m so hurt, maybe I’ll go wipe my tears with my belts to feel better… Maybe two won’t be enough, maybe I should get another two when this is all said and done.
Roland
Shut the hell up, Bateman. People’s lives are at stake, and all you seem to give a shit about is those belts-
Hokma
Enough, both of you. Your infantile bickering will not be tolerated, especially now.

We will not stop everything for Travis, Roland.

If he had truly found an undocumented gap, we cannot do anything until it is found.

But until we have evidence that proves that either a new gap had formed or sightings of Travis within, we cannot act.

Circumstances force our hand, we cannot stop right as war stands at our doorstep.
Roland
But they’re not gonna stop at him, Hokma. They’ll start going for others, like Angela-
Hokma
And that is all the more reason why we must stop them now before they can touch anyone else.

I understand your worries, Roland. But do not mistake my inaction for cowardice.

These attacks are a misdirection, and we cannot afford to be distracted at this crucial moment.

If you do not agree with this course of action, then you can try and search for him yourself.
Roland
Bateman
Yeah, Roland. Listen to him-
Hokma
As for you Bateman, this investigation is not about you. I will not entertain your childish glory hounding.

If you care more about satiating your ego, Bateman. I can have you escorted out of here and brought back into the wrestling federation.

I’ll gladly even give you a chance to get the other belts, if you are willing to risk the ones you hold.

And maybe you’ll win them, or perhaps you lose them, leaving you trapped within the midcard until fate deems otherwise.

This investigation is the only way you are going to keep a long reign of those belts, Bateman.

Am I clear?
Bateman
-Bateman looks dead inside for a second, then smiles-
Bateman
Fine then, Hokma. Have it your way.
Hokma
It is Sir Ayin's will that you two work together, not mine. You should do your best to not test his patience.
Bateman
Hokma
Glad that this has been cleared up. Now, I must tend to other matters. Make sure you are ready for the incursion. We are not waiting any longer.
-Hokma leaves-
Roland
Bateman
Roland
Not waiting any longer, huh? I guess Soma and Ringabel are gonna be missing out on all the fun then.
Bateman
Knowing guys like them, they’re probably too scared of chipping a fingernail. Wonder if you had to worry about that when that chick made you grow some assets.
Roland
…I’m not even gonna dignify that with a response.
Bateman
You just did.
-Lore ends-

A Leak[edit | edit source]

Kuze
(...Not a single word about the guy. Had he changed his name? Or did he actually run away like the punk bitch he is?) (Hmph, guess I’ll figure something out when I see Travis and Nier again, whenever Travis gets outta the hospital…)
???
Hey, you mind me takin’ a seat?
Kuze
???
I’ll take that as a yes.
-figure sits down, revealed to be Q-taro-
Q-taro
Hey, you were at the clinic, weren’t you? The guy who looked like he fell out of a building.
Kuze
…Think you got me confused with someone else.
Q-taro
No, you were the guy. Guess ya’ got lucky. I kinda wish I were in your shoes right now.
Kuze
My shoes ain’t the kind you wanna be in.
Q-taro
Trust me, it is. I’ve had a shitty few months. And it seems things are only gonna get worse. It seems that my life’s a bad joke that everybody but me got.
Kuze
And what’s the joke?
Q-taro
Well, how’d you feel if you had been living a lie for a few years and nobody ever bothered to tell you until recently?
Kuze
…I dunno, I guess I'd be pissed off about it.
Q-taro
Well, that’s what happened to me. And I dunno how to go about it.
Kuze
…I guess go find another purpose or something is all I can say.
Q-taro
Perhaps, maybe… Uhhh… I dunno.
Kuze
Well, I dunno what else to tell you. All I know is I gotta take a leak. I’ll talk to you later, if you’re still here.
-kuze leaves-
Q-taro
…Maybe I should try and talk to them…
-Starts in the TCR Public Bathroom-
-Woody and Hugh talk while violating the urinal code-
Woody
Well this wholly blows! That cocksucker in a cape killed any chances of us gettin' those belts!

And with everyone leavin' to go who cares where, that just gives me less things to be doin' 'round here!}}

Hugh
Isn't it a funny coincidence Bateman takes two belts with him just before heading away for who knows how long?

While the tag-team belts are being held right now by a different member of that same organization?

All under direct control of Sundowner and his goons who held all of these belts just prior to this...

Now ain't that just quackin' crazy, Woody?
Woody
They just don't wanna see a man of my talent takin' away their prized possessions, huh!
Hugh
Say, Bateman seems to know a lot about hoarding things away and running off with them! I wonder what Bateman's family's surname was before they fled to America?
Woody
Well I reckon there's still a few welfare belts to mosey on after but they just don’t rub the right spots!
Hugh
Well! With everyone leaving, none of those big guys can stop us from claiming this whole fed as our own turf, huh!
Woody
We could make up any belt we damn well please!
Hugh
That’d be great if we could keep ‘em away from those renaissance fair attendees!
Woody
I’ll have to give that fine little blue haired boy a piece o’my mind next time I see him in these halls!
-Pissing sound, have the textbox blank for it-
Hugh
Ah! Ducks! Not again!
Woody
You got a problem pardner?
Hugh
I forgot to unzip my fly!
Woody
Waste of perfectly good ol’ piss right there! Ya’ should’a saved it for the wife!
-Kuze walks in, door creaking sound-
Woody
Well howdy to ya', fella! What brings ya' to our base of operations?
Kuze
"Base of operations"? This is a fuckin’ bathroom anyone can use.
Hugh
Actually, you’ve just entered the Shadow Realm, little buddy!
Woody
Aww! C'mon, pal! There's no need to be so stiff 'round us! You should loosen up a little!
Kuze
I'm not here to make chitchat with one of the village people.
Hugh
Oh, that is a kneeslapper!
Kuze
Most people don't like to be disturbed while using the bathroom but I guess guys like you are too loose to know how bathrooms work.
Woody
But I do know you’ve got some belts on ya’, friend! Why don’t you share a little with the rest of us? Maybe we can unbuckle a belt or two from ya'!
Kuze
I’m not sure how a place can stay running while it employs freaks like yourself. Your friend here pissed himself, by the way.
Woody
Employees? Yehahaha! We’re gonna take over this ol’ company now that the big boys are goin’ away!
Hugh
We’re taking the “be the change you want to see” advice literally! And that means stopping anyone who’s in the way of things!
Kuze
You really think I’m gonna go as low as fight a man who pisses himself?
Hugh
You’re gonna be leaking like a faulty faucet when I’m-
-Kuze knocks out Hugh-
Kuze
Let’s make this quick, I’ve still gotta take a leak.
Woody
I’ve never starred in one of those Japanese adult videos before, should’a brought the cherry out for this one!

  1. Woody
  2. Daisaku Kuze
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • Backstage Brawl

Daisaku Kuze Winner

The First Strike Against Darkness[edit | edit source]

Gebura
With all due respect, Ayin. But is it really a good idea not letting us in on this?
Ayin
You are needed here, Gebura.
Gebura
But… Why? We’re all set, ready to deal with the bears, with our full strength we can get ‘em all in one. End them here, and now!
Ayin
And if we overcommit, we’ll leave our backlines defenceless. The scope is… it’s much bigger now, Gebura.

It’s not just the abnormalities of the facility, not just the knowledge of the Library… We’re holding the lives of people of an entire country in our hands.

If something from The Otherside slips through, if it wreaks havoc on Britannia, it’d be catastrophic.

You are correct, your prowess with EGO is our strongest asset.

As such, if anything happens on the Ship, I’ll not be worried, since you’ll be there.

To protect, oppose and retaliate against anything that would threaten our home.
Gebura
Hn… Fine. Guess I’ll do my usual job, then. I bet you just wanna make sure that Binah doesn’t take things too far. But, for the record, I’m not happy about this. Missing out on action like that…
-exit geb-
-enter hok-
Hokma
Has Gebura been placated?
Ayin
Yes. She’ll guard Britannia, as will the rest of Sephirah.
Hokma
Very well. Then the population is in safe hands, indeed.
Ayin
...I assume there is no news with regards to sightings?
Hokma
No, no whereabouts confirmed of primary and secondary targets. Sir, we…
Ayin
I know, we can’t delay any further. We can only hope they’ll survive this.

Let’s go, Hokma. The bears have languished long enough in the safety of their dimension.

Time to show them just how wrong they were.
-scene change to otherside?-
-Sunny D, Roland and Axel present already-
-homa and ayin enter-
Roland
Where’s those dimensional guys? They haven’t shown their faces around in ages.
Haru
Think someone got a hold of them?
Bateman
Those two? Only way I can see them showing up is if their jaws get tired.
-Zooms into Guts, the others fade out-
Nyarlathotep
You asked for my help, I gave you it.  Now you must hold your side of the deal.
Hastur
You wanted the power to save them all. A naive ambition, but one I entertained.
Guts
Shut the hell up…
Nyarlathotep
I have upheld my side of the bargain. You got what you wanted, a deal is a deal.
Hastur
All power demands a sacrifice, child. You cannot back out from your obligations.
Carmen
Keep going, you must keep going. Do not give them the satisfaction of submitting.
Nyarlathotep
You know what must be done, Guts. You’ve always known how this ends, now is the time…
Hastur
I demand a sacrifice, you will give it to me. You must…
Carmen
Fight it, keep going. They need your help, you can…
All the voices
Do it!
-Cuts back to reality, interrupted by Ringabel and Soma-
Guts
Grrgh..!
Ringabel
Have no fear, for we are here! Ready to take battle to the forces that dare threaten this realm!
Roland
So you finally found the place, what took you so long?
Soma
…It only took us a few weeks to find where you were setting up.
Axel
Well, count your lucky stars. You better have a good excuse for when Sundowner comes down here.
Akasaka
Where were you guys? We didn’t see you after we went to the bar!
Haru
We figured someone killed ya or something.
Ringabel
Reports of our demise must have been greatly exaggerated! As for our absence…
Soma
Long story, but you know that building fire?
Roland
The I Corp building? Guy who owns that place had to come back to working with us cus of it. What about it?
Soma
We… may- I mean, were involved in that.
Cole
That was you?! There were rumours that it was a remnant of the cult that did that.
Norman
I thought the Tsuliban said that they took credit for it.
Ringabel
Be that which it may, we had to stop a sacrificial ritual from taking place!
Roland
Sacrificial ritual? Are you joking? Those guys were the ones who sent Tsubasa over to partner with Angela!
Ringabel
Come again?
Bateman
Yeah, those guys like fucking their talent, not selling them to the devil. The only thing you’d call a ritual there is what happens behind closed doors in those casting rooms.
Soma
…Oh.
Bateman
Nevermind that, you both look like hobos. Have you been walking through a forest?
Soma
Yeah, we had to walk through the woods. And Ringabel insisted that he knew the way.
Ringabel
Well I got us there, didn’t I?
Soma
Only because I had my phone GPS point us in the right direction.
-Sundowner appears with Manager-
Sundowner
Well, well, well! Looks like the nancy boys finally found home! I was about ready to track yer down!
Ringabel
Greetings Sundowner, I assure that we had not been up to any-
Sundowner
Shut it, I know what ya’ll been up to! Stickin’ yer nose in bullshit that’s none of yer damn business!

Least you didn’t stick around to explain to those dickshit cops about why your ass was settin’ fires!

And cus of that and the fact I’m in a good mood today, I’m not gonna put your sorry asses out as point men!
Soma
Thanks… I guess?
Sundowner
Enough of the pleasantries, our Manager got some shit to say.
Ayin
Thanks, Sundowner.

Gentlemen. We are no strangers to adversity, Britannia has faced many adversaries before.

The Big Dog Invasion, The Burch Incident, The Empire’s Return…. My past, that had caught up to me…

This is no different, just another one to add to the list.

These creatures, from another realm of reality, who take our people and use them as their playthings.

They have taken our wrestlers, forced them to play these silly games for their lives, one has escaped.

But fifteen others still remain, trapped within The Otherside. The Bears hold them for nefarious purposes still unknown to us.

There’s no time, their retaliations escalate. Attempted hostage taking, attacks on our people, even terrorism.

They’ve killed a friend of the King, who’s to say they will not sink any lower?

What I ask of you is not an easy thing. But it is necessary. We do not leave our people to die at the mercy of anyone.

These Bears will not escape unpunished, we must take the fight to them.

We will go down to where they live, where they feed and we’ll bring back our wrestlers!

And when we bring them back, the Bears will answer for their sins.

So come, friend or employee, follow me into this battle. And make them rue the day they ever dared to crawl out of their holes!
Crowd
Yeah!
Sundowner
Yer woulda made a good general, Manager.
Ayin
In another life, perhaps... Hokma, status report.
Hokma
All preparations are complete, every member of the force is ready, and so is everything unmanned.
Sundowner
Now then, lemme ask, how about the missiles ‘n all that?
Hokma
Ready as well, we have a massive arsenal of such, enhanced by the work of Eggman, Walter and Luis.
Sundowner
Those three geeks? What that tells me, is yer got me all three of the good ‘ol NBC!
Roland
NBC?
Sundowner
Nuclear, Biological AND Chemical! The kinda shit that would make limpdicks like Oppenheimer weep!

But I doubt some two-bit demon shits signed the Geneva Suggestion, and guess what! Neither have I! All’s fair game when it comes to love n’ war!

Lemme show you boys what we Americans call “SHOCK AND AWE”!

PREP THOSE MISSILES BOYS! WE’RE TURNIN’ GHOULS INTO GHOSTS!
Axel
Wait, this is a rescue mission!
Sundowner
Ah, those boys’ll be fine, none of ‘em fuckin died yet last I heard!

We shred these things with bombs, and we walk in behind with the mobile units!

Now then…These little bear fucks want a war? THEN LET’S GIVE ‘EM A WAR THEY’LL NEVER FORGET!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
-sounds of missiles being launched-

EE-02: Missile Dodger[edit | edit source]

Travelling Knight
There is no sign of any monsters behind us… We must have eluded them!
Dyatlov
Stop the damn truck! I’m gonna be sick!
El Loco
Fine already you fuckin’ vodka loving drunk! I’ll stop! Could do with a smoke anyway… -Sound of truck stopping, put next text after- Everyone get out and stretch your legs or whatever.
-cut to van on bridge panning over the city-
-Dyatlov is standing at the rail “vomiting”-
George
I… I can’t believe we made it outta there!
El Loco
Don’t start celebrating now, Fats. Save it for when we get back home.
Midge
You fackin’ nutter! What were you thinking back there?! You coulda fuckin’ got us all killed!
El Loco
I was thinking about a senorita with big fat tits blowing me, midget. What were you thinking?
Travelling Knight
You have a strange way of calming yourself during war, magician.
George
But what about James and the others? We’ve left them behind! You can’t just leave them there!
Dyatlov
Fool! You want to bring them back to the others?! Are you mad?!
Travelling Knight
For once I agree with our paranoid friend. We agreed to be the distraction. And our ploy has bought them time!
George
But James is the only one who knows where the portal is! And we’ve left them behind! We need to get back!
Travelling Knight
There is no worry to be had, my compatriot. We can easily return to them once we know the monsters cannot return, isn’t that right El Loco?
El Loco
Yeah, then we’ll just turn back and catch up with them- …
Midge
Why’s he gone all quiet?
El Loco
-Realisation slowly dawns on him that he has driven out of shiokawa-
-Keep on this for like 10 second-

…FUCK!

Shit! Shit! SHIT!
Dyatlov
We couldn’t have driven that far! It’s just impossible! The bears did this, I tell you!
George
That is what I've been trying to tell you!
El Loco
Get the fuck back in-
-Missile hits the road-
-The group is knocked down except midge, he is so small the shockwave goes over him-
Midge
Fuckin’ ‘ell, finally can see you all eye to eye for once!
El Loco
Urgh… What the fuck was that?
-Dyatlov stands up-
Dyatlov
I know those missiles from anywhere! Those are capitalist missiles! There must be oil down here!
-El Loco stands up-
El Loco
Shit! Whatever the hell they are from, those fucking bombs are bringing heat down on us! We gotta get the fuck outta here! Come on! Get the fuck up, Don Quixote! No fuckin time for a nap!
-Travelling Knight stands up-
Travelling Knight
I have never heard of this Don-
-BOOM-
Travelling Knight
On second thoughts, we should escape this dragon’s wrath!
El Loco
Take the midget and get fatso in the truck, I’m not sticking around to see where those bombs go next!
Midge
What’s got you all- ARGH YA TWATS!
-cut to truck interior, sound of engine trying to start up-
El Loco
Come on… Come the fuck on…
Dyatlov
The missiles are getting closer!
El Loco
I fucking know! It’s not gonna make this piece of shit start any faster!
-Engine starts up-
-Start RPG-

[RPG]

EE-03: The Jump[edit | edit source]

El Loco: Here we fucking go! Brace yourselves!
Dyatlov
YOU ARE SERIOUSLY JUMPING!?
El Loco
YES! I AM! NOW BRACE!
Knight
Hold on as this horse buckles like mad!

[RPG]


El Loco
Fuckin’ hell. Last time I’ll try to jump off a ramp with a truck. But hell, George, you can be a pretty good counterweight when there’s a need for it.
George
Uhh… Thanks, I guess.
El Loco
The missile strikes seem to have stopped for now at least.
Dyatlov
It most certainly must be those bears!
Midge
Are you a peanut brain? It’s likely that cyborg shithead Sundowner!
Knight
The little one is right, he has always had the penchant for shock and awe.
George
Peanuts… Damn, any sort of food could do right now, actually.
El Loco
Well, looks like this is some sort of gas station, I don’t hear or see any beasts, or missiles. We could quickly look for anything left in there, which might come in handy.
Dyatlov
There’s a garage here too, might have some stuff we could use to fix the truck with.
El Loco
Hell yeah, I know how to make some simple repairs, customary of an ex-drug runner.

EE-04: Gas Station[edit | edit source]

[RPG]

*laughs*[edit | edit source]

  1. Shun Akiyama
  2. Tidus
  3. Psycho
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • Triple-Threat
  • Elimination

Elimination By
Tidus Shun Akiyama
Psycho
Shun Akiyama Winner

EE-05: Highway Of Death[edit | edit source]

[RPG]

EE-06: Ride Of The Valkyries[edit | edit source]

[RPG]

Not Roycist, Just Don't Loike 'em[edit | edit source]

  1. Wakka
  2. Jean Arwall
  3. Ace Visconti
  4. MC Ride
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • Fatal-4-Way

Elimination By
Jean Arwall Ace Visconti
Ace Visconti Winner

Disgraced Protector[edit | edit source]

Dagoth Ur
Seeing as we are next in line for contendership. Perhaps we should seek to bring those tag belts back to us. Though, to us enlightened men, they are the equivalent of pizza parlour game tokens.
Sigurd
With Guts and Psycho holding the belts, the road will certainly be tough. But I'm sure we can dethrone them too.
Dagoth Ur
Is there any doubt? How can they kill a god? What a-
Sigurd
Dagoth, Guts says he managed to kill a god down in that Otherside place? Just goes to show how they managed to get those belts, they're proven warriors too.
Dagoth Ur
Hmph, and they would be nothing when, one day, we shall achieve CHIM. Now then, let us-
???
AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I... I LOST AGAIIIIIIIN!!! TEEEEEEEEESAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Dagoth Ur
Ah, the sounds of a dying mongrel, a fate fitting for an n'wah.
Sigurd
That wasn't some dog, that was a man. Come on, let's go check it out.
-Cut to a different Backstage BG-
???
Tesa… I know you're still out there! I'm the only one who's ever there for ya'…

You need to put ya' trust in me… Let me write your music…

Let me be your phantom of a new paradise…
-ENTER Dagoth and Sigurd-
Sigurd
Halloween was a very long time ago. What's with the outfit? Do you recognise this guy, Dagoth?
Dagoth Ur
You must be unwise to think I'd associate with someone with such a penchant for leather. I'm more surprised his obsession sounds to be directed towards a woman, considering that look.
Sigurd
Hey, whoever you are, what's your name?
???
HUH!?
Sigurd
Your name, what is it?
"Boa tarde amigo"?
BOA TARDE AMIGO!!!!!
-cut to a zoom in on dagoths face, have in the background the KILL ARGONIANS BEHEAD ARGONIANS etc clip playing-
Dagoth Ur

That's not a name, I'm going to pretend you never said that.

State your name, mongrel dog.
"The Phantom"?
I AM THE PHANTOM!! FROM WITHIN THE SHADOWS I SHALL PROTECT TESA!!
Dagoth Ur
Your name, mongrel. I do not care for your stage name, your real name, I am not here to play “leather club”.
"The Phantom"
I HAVE TOO MANY ENEMIES!! THEY WOULD GO AFTER THOSE I LOVE! FUCK YOU!
Dagoth Ur
That is how you honour the sixth house and the tribe unmourned? Looks like the n'wah is getting uppity. Perhaps he needs to be reminded where his place is?
Sigurd
You know, I think I remember this guy. Wasn't he in that big title match?
Dagoth Ur
Seeing as he does not have two titles on him that makes him a loser of said title match.

Well then, we will have to remind him of his place, a loser beneath those stronger than him.

Such is the destiny of a filthy n'wah that dares try to disgrace House Dagoth.

  1. "The Phantom"
  2. The Heart of MarthDagoth Ur & Sigurd
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • Fatal-4-Way

Elimination By
"The Phantom" Sigurd
The Heart of Marth Winner

EE-07: A Need for Gas[edit | edit source]

Dyatlov
At this rate one of those missiles is going to hit us dead on!
George
Well what are we gonna do!?
El Loco
Look! There’s some big factory over there! We’ll just park up inside there for a bit! All these bombs are scaring those beasts away. It should be safe to head over there!
Knight
Good idea! Let them be the target of this hellfire instead!
-cut to inside factory-
El Loco
Talk about good fortune, looks like this is some kinda bunker too. Unless they throw something big, we should be fine.
George
Hey look over here!
El Loco
Well count our lucky stars, that’s a fuckin’ radio! Dyatlov, how’s that generator back there?
Dyatlov
Out of fuel it looks like, so no power to the radio at the moment. If we can get this running, maybe we could get into contact with the ones bombing our location.
El Loco
And maybe give them pointers on our location and where we’re all heading to.
Knight
Perfect! Then we shall guide the Winged Hussars to drive these creatures back for good!
Midge
This better not involve any more vents or keyholes!

[RPG]

Studying the Chad Gene[edit | edit source]

  1. Luis Sera & Eggman
  2. Nier & Dimitri Blaiddyd
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • Elimination
  • Tag-Team

Elimination By
Luis Sera Nier
TEAM Nier Winner

No Hero Awakens[edit | edit source]

-scene change to hospital-
Travis
Urgh… The hell happened… Where am I? Lain… that you?
Tiphereth
I think the anaesthetic is making you see things, I’m Tiphereth, we’ve met before. And the old lady here is Binah.
Binah
…Greetings, welcome guest.
Travis
You… Right, you’re the hag in black, from the Lab… What’re you doin’ here? Got bored of scarin’ little boys?
Tiphereth
She’s here because of what happened to you.
Binah
Your act of Manifestation left you without strength. Those you call allies carried you in. Circumstances piqued our interest.
Travis
Shit… how long was I out for?
Tiphereth
By now, it’s been several hours. Some thug in glasses checked in on you.
Travis
Hah… glad to know Kuze cares.
Tiphereth
We were also told of what occurred in the Otherside. What you did was stupid and reckless.

Which would’ve dragged others into it if you didn’t return.

But… You did reveal a backdoor in the centre of our facilities. And thwarted the plans of the bears, for however long.

So uh… Good job on that, I guess.
Travis
Ya shouldn't count Henry’s flunkies out. Not sure if killing off Henry even mattered that much to them. They’ll probably come looking for revenge now, come to think of it.
Binah
Noted. May I offer you a piece of advice?
Travis
Hit me, grandma.
Binah
After you’ve recovered, nurture the Seed that sprouted into a Bough. In time, it may prove more capable than what L Corp can provide, in either iteration.
Travis
Sure. I want to test it out, myself, it really feels like I barely scratched the surface of what I can do.
Tiphereth
Also, go to the Floor of Records ASAP. We need to take your samples again.
Binah
To bloom, and to have records of being less than a seed… You are quite a unique sprout, assassin.
Tiphereth
I mean, there’s some weirdo in a crow’s mask running around… Maybe…
Binah
That remains a mystery. You, however, are a known entity. Perhaps, in comparison, we can see if the Manifestation triggers changes in the body, as well.
Travis
Right…  All for the good cause and shit, yeah?
Binah
Quite. Now, it’s our time to depart. Two of your most fervent followers have been kept waiting for long enough.
Tiphereth
See you around, Travis. And… Again, good job.
-sephirah leave, lain and dimitri enter-
Lain
Travis! You’re awake!
Travis
Hey, Lain. Sorry to make you worry…
Dimitri
She’s been waiting outside for hours. An admirable tenacity.
Travis
Damn. Now I feel even more like an asshole. Are the others alright? It was quite the scare.
Lain
Yeah, they’re fine. They stuck around for a while… But Angela was called to do something for the Investigation, and the others had booked matches.
Travis
Hah, I see… And Nier?
Dimitri
He went to check on your apartment. The… faux corpse is still there. It may not be real, but the blood staining the sheets is. It’ll take some time to fix it up, unfortunately.
Travis
Well, I’ll be stuck here for a while, but Lain…
Lain
Tsu offered a spot for me. Might even make a sleepover out of it. Could be fun.
Travis
Nice…

Dimitri, can I ask you a favor?
Dimitri
Of course, what is it?
Travis
This whole shindig got me thinking… We made it out alive this time, sure, but what if next time we won’t get so lucky?

Had to be bailed out by a voice in my head… If I were just a bit younger, I’d tear that motherfucker limb from limb…

What I mean is… If, in the future, some fuckhead finally does me in…
Dimitri
I will avenge your death, I promi-
Travis
Nah, nah, fuck that cycle of vengeance, If I’m dying, I’m taking that guy with me. Maybe haunt his ass as a ghost, dunno. Just… Dimitri, please, protect Lain, if I’m not able to. Don’t let her get caught in the crossfire. That’s all I ask.
Lain
T-Travis…
Dimitri
…I promise.
Travis
Nice… That’s so… sublime… to hear…
Dimitri
...You’re getting tired. I’ll leave you be. Rest well, Travis. I promise… I’ll not forget this oath I gave.
-dimitri leaves-
Lain
Why… Why did you ask him that?!
Travis
Lain, cmon, you can see it too. I’m past my prime. The shit I get involved in doesn’t make it any better, either.

Already cut all ties with the past that I could…

I just don’t want to fuck this one thing up. Your safety, your happiness… That’s all I need.
Lain
Dummy… If you’re gone, do you think I’ll be happy? I’d be more likely to close this world, than to remain in it without you.
Travis
Lain…
Lain
So… promise me. To stay with me, till the end.
Travis
…I will. Even when you open the next world, I’ll be with you.
Lain
Good… Sleep, Travis. Rest, and heal…
Travis
What… about you…?
Lain
I’m not leaving you. It’s a two-way promise.
Travis
Hah… great… good night… Lain…
-fade to black-
Lain
Thank you… <pause, scroll text>  my No More Hero…

Porn Archetype Chamber[edit | edit source]

  1. Big Dog #6
  2. Sion Bloodwalker #5
  3. Big Show #3
  4. Luka #4
  5. Heavy #1
  6. 90 #2
  • Game: WWE 2K19
  • Elimination Chamber

Elimination By
Big Show Luka
Luka Heavy
Sion Bloodwalker Big Dog
90
Heavy
Big Dog Winner

EE-08: Final Stretch[edit | edit source]

Dyatlov
Come on… This fuel better still be good for use! Knight, come here and help me with getting the engine running, I need a bit of elbow grease for this one.
Knight
With haste!
-sounds of an engine try to start up-
Dyatlov
Come on! Come on! You may be old but you aren’t going to be a piece of shit on me! Just a bit more and…
-engine start working-
Dyatlov
There it is! The power is back on!
El Loco
Perfect, now to try and tune this in, then we can tell them where to actually point their shit.
-radio being tuned-
El Loco
Right… Now what frequency are they using…
Midge
Hurry it up you morons!
George
We’re doing what we can! Unless you think crawling into the radio and messing with the electronics inside could help!
El Loco
Shut up! I’ve almost got it!
???
“-Ugly lookin’-”
El Loco
Almost there, just gotta fine tune it…
???
“-For extraction purposes!”
Dyatlov
That certainly sounds like him!
-radio static ends as the radio is now properly tuned-
Sundowner
“Armoured division take the flank on the approach to the hill! Blast these shitheads to nothin’ but gore!” “Bag n’ tag ‘em if yer can, otherwise send ‘em to a hell beyond hell itself!”
El Loco
And there we have it! Let me try the microphone! Hey! Sundowner! Do you hear us!?
Sundowner
“Well I’ll be, the lot we’re after found themselves a radio! Didn’t take any of ya’ to know how to operate one!”
El Loco
Enough with the chat, tell your men to stop throwing shit at a truck driving away from Shiokawa! That’s us! Fire at the shit behind us! Not at us!
Sundowner
“Got it! Hey! Dumbshits! Monsters can’t drive cars, y’know! Those’re the ones we’re lookin’ for!” “So then boys, what’s yer status?”
El Loco
We got separated by the others, we split into three groups to make sure they couldn’t take all of us down at once.
Sundowner
"Yeah? Well I guess I've got sum' great news for ya'! Yer' lil buddies are on the move!” “That tracker we gave to yer friend is movin’ all over the damn place, don’t you worry about him, we’ll get him.”
El Loco
They’re out of Shiokawa!?
Sundowner
“Yeah, that’s why I’ve been bombin’ that place to high hell! No risk of hittin’ what we came ‘ere for!”
Midge
You’ve nearly hit us multiple times!
Sundowner
“Shit, ya’ got that little runt with ya’? Maybe I should waltz down there and beat his ass before those ugly shits can!”
El Loco
We can drive him right to you if you make sure not to fuckin’ bomb us!
Sundowner
“Deal! Drive yer asses down here ASAP then, I want that tiny creature here with a matchbox casket!”
-goes to static-
El Loco
You heard the man, let’s get back in the van and get the fuck outta here!

[RPG]


El Loco
Shit, looks like the road is blocked. Guess we’ve gotta go by foot now.
Knight
The creatures chasing us seem to have vanished, truly a miracle!
George
That's good, I dunno how quickly I could run from them…
El Loco
Looks like some sort of mountainside view, and there's a route we can take over this way.
Dyatlov
Looks like we went past that town on the way. Do you think the others have found another way around?
El Loco
Well, Sundowner did say he saw weird movements from that tracker, so I think they all found another way.
==[edit | edit source]
-drone footage-
Sundowner
Now that's what ya’ call shock n' awe!

Plenty’a those ugly mutts just got turned into dust just like that.

Oh… What's this??

Hahahaha! These shitbags got a missile silo of their own it looks like!

Well, gotta make sure it won't work, send in one of the big ones!
==[edit | edit source]
El Loco
…-Then go on to meet at this place, you got it?
George
Doesn't seem like a long walk at least…
Midge
Well one of you shits better carry me over there!
Knight
I have full faith that our comrades will survive their ordeals too!
El Loco
Speaking of, it's way too quiet around-
-nuke in the distance-
El Loco
FUCKING HELL!!!
Dyatlov
Dear God… That's a nuclear bomb!!
Knight
Such destructive force!
El Loco
Get the fuck going! Last thing I want is radiation poisoning!
George
G-got it! Midge, climb up on my shoulder!