TCR/S1E8

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Three Mad Lads Get Disguises[edit | edit source]

Dimitri
God! I'm sick of waiting around! It feels like the world turns as we just stand still! HUNK! How goes things!
HUNK
Well, it looks likely our side or those strange men will win over WEW in the doubles. The one-on-one tournament looks dire though...
Dimitri
Hrm. All we need is one title victory anyways.
HUNK
I have better news though.
El Loco Bandito
Say it! Did you get my dicksucker back?!
HUNK
Sadly no, but I figured to try and find a way to sneak you guys in too. In the storage here I found this crate.
James
What are these?
HUNK
They're alien tech used by the Bogs to hide their looks in investor meetings. Or in short: disguises. Try them on
James
If you say so...
El Loco Bandito
Hey! Pass me more double sided tape!
Dimitri
Do I really have to take my eyepatch off?
James
If this helps TCR...
HUNK
Well, what do you guys think?
Dimitri
...This is just glasses and a fake moustache, HUNK
El Loco Bandito
And not even a fake moustache in my case! What is this bullshit?
HUNK
Trust me, if it can disguise the Bogs, it will disguise you guys.
El Loco Bandito
Yeah okay, just be ready to bail us out if shit goes south though!
HUNK
Sure
[Dimitri, James and El Loco leave]
HUNK
Surely TFR would've heard about what's going on by now? Any moment now, surely

Match 1[edit | edit source]

Ace Visconti vs Anthony Burch

Ace wins Via Pin

Match 2[edit | edit source]

Luis vs Yugi vs Spigot vs Sundowner vs Jesusbarrel vs Dagoth Ur Elimination Chamber

Jesusbarrel pins Luis

Sundowner pins Yugi

Jesusbarrel pins Spigot

Sundowner pins Dagoth

Sundowner pins Jesusbarrel

Sundowner is the winner

The Mad Lads Sneak Into WeW[edit | edit source]

El Loco Bandito
Okay motherfuckers, it's time to make our way into this joint. Don't fuck this up by having your balls shrink all of a sudden.
[Hubert comes into view]
Hubert
Okay, next.

Hello, welcome to World Empire Wrestling, WEW, for short, you looking to join us?

Dimitri
Join? The only thing joining here is my fist and your-
El Loco Bandito
HE SAYS HE'LL GLADLY JOIN! WHERE DO WE SIGN UP MY MAN! Dude, you nearly fucked us over, shut up if you can't stop raging.
Hubert
Is something wrong?
El Loco Bandito
Oh no no no, it's fine, my friend here has a uh.... anger issues!
Hubert
My! Perhaps he can take his anger out into the ring!
Dimitri
Oh I'll show you-
El Loco Bandito
SHUT UP! Right where do we sign?
Hubert
Alright just sign... There! Welcome to WEW! By the way, you never said your names?
The Mad Bandit
Well... uh... I'm The Mad Bandit!
Not Dimitri
I'm uhhh... Not Dimitri!
Not James
Not James here!
The Mad Bandit
You fucking morons, I swear if-
Hubert
So, The Mad Bandit, Not Dimitri and Not James? Certainly some interesting names! Come right in!
The Mad Bandit
Uhhh... I mean, thank you! Come on guys, let's head in
[Everything goes dark, only El Loco Bandito is shown]
The Mad Bandit
(What the fuck just happened? I swear I didn't smoke this morning.) (Whatever, we're in now, now what?)

Match 3[edit | edit source]

EL LOCO VS majima = EL LOCO


Match 4[edit | edit source]

LUKA VS UGLY BASTARD = LUKA

Match 5[edit | edit source]

15-MINUTE IRONMAN: DIMITRI VS HANK = CAME TO DRAW, SUDDEN DEATH MEANT HANK WON
Dimitri pins Hank

Hank pins Dimitri

Hank pins Dimitri (Sudden Death)

Hank wins

Spigot is Manager's Manager (This totally rolls off the tongue)[edit | edit source]

Spigot
YO HOW'S MY BEST LAD DOING!

YOU FINALLY GOT A FANCY FUCKIN' SUIT! WELL, VEST, BUT WHATEVER NOW. YOU'RE STILL IN THE SOLOS, I'M NOT! BUT I HAVE A PLAN TO HELP YOU THERE TOO!!! YOU SEE, I'LL SAY I'M YOUR MANAGER!

Manager
[You ask if this is even going to be allowed or not...]
Spigot
OH IT'S FINE!!!

ALL THE JUDGES NEEDED TO TURN THE OTHER WAY... WAS WITH SOME ORAL FROM YOUR'S TRULY! I'LL HELP YOU GET YOUR BELT! WE'LL BOTH GET OUR BELTS! JUST REMEMBER! I'M HERE TO MAKE YOUR TWOSOMES INTO THREESOMES! WE'RE GONNA KICK SOME NERD ASS!

Match 6[edit | edit source]

James Sunderland vs Bane

Bane wins via Pin

Match 7[edit | edit source]

DUOS TOURNEY: TF2 VS Pissdrinkers

Pissdrinkers wins via Belias pinning Heavy

Match 8[edit | edit source]

DUOS TOURNEY: Hip To Be Noided Vs 'murica

Hip To Be Noided wins via Patrick Bateman pinning Sim


Promo of The Gamer Wizard[edit | edit source]

Hubert
We are here live from the WEW Arena! A beautiful Saturday night to watch the Champions of the Empire tournaments!

I am your host, Hubert von Vestra, and joining me today is a man who calls himself, "The Gamer Wizard"!

The Gamer Wizard
YES EVERYONE! IT IS I! THE GAMER WIZARD! HERE TO SLAY CHAD AND STACY!
Hubert
How do you feel about the opponent you'll be facing tonight, know as "Midge"?
The Gamer Wizard
MIDGE? THAT IS HIS NAME? I THOUGHT HE WAS ONE OF MY GAMER GOBLINS THAT ESCAPED FROM MY GAMER LAIR!

BUT I SUPPOSE ITS EASY TO BE MISTAKEN FOR ONE WHEN YOU LOOK LIKE A DEFORMED GREMLIN! TELL ME HUBERT? WHY DOES THIS MIDGE DRESS SO FUNNY? A GLITTERY SUIT? I THOUGHT THIS WAS A WRESTLING SHOW NOT A GAY BAR!

Hubert
I'm not sure on his outfit myself, but how confident are you in fighting Midge in your bout tonight?
The Gamer Wizard
I SHALL USE HIS HEAD AS A FOOTBALL! I HEARD ON HIS CV HE WAS A HUMAN FOOTBALL SO HE WILL BE USED TO IT!

ONCE I BANISH THIS GOBLIN FROM THE RING LIKE HE WAS BANISHED FROM THE GAMER LAIR... I SHALL GO BACK TO MY GAMER LAIR AND SPEEDRUN DIGIMON WORLD THREE TO CELEBRATE MY VICTORY!

Hubert
The Gamer Wizard shows plenty of passion towards his fight! But will his passion translate to his fighting spirit?

Find out, in World Empire Wrestling!

Match 9[edit | edit source]

SOLO TOURNEY: The Gamer Wizard vs Midge

Midge wins via pin

Match 10[edit | edit source]

SOLO TOURNEY: Woody vs Manager (w/ Spigot supporting)

Woody wins via pin

(Much fucking good those ego gifts did him)