Security Joe

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The very definition of generic.

T-Pose God[edit | edit source]

A simple security guard.

Somehow, he has all kinds of cousins and other familiars all over Coolsville.

Season 5[edit | edit source]

The leader of a security guard team, who works part time at both Junes and TFR.

Episode 5

A slim man tries to get into Junes despite it being closed by the police, so he calls reinforcements: Security Guard Omar, Security Guard Guillermo and Security Guard Dwight, but Omar informs him that Dwight is on that side jig he's doing since '92. So just the three of them take and subdue the weak man.

Episode 7

While keeping the man in a cell, he and Joe discover they are kindred souls with a love for Gachi, and he even auditioned and stole the role of a similarly looking weak man from a famous Gachi video. Joe seems him as having learned his lesson and lets him go.

Episode 11

Drags a hotheaded Haze Stratos out of Hideo's office.

A nurse who is his cousin treats Ooishi Kuraudo.

Episode 12

After Kirei's defeat, security drags him away.

However... at the end of the death game, he breaks out by killing Joe.

Season 6[edit | edit source]

He's still dead.

Episode 2

His cousin, a McDonalds attendant, recognizes a mmman who cannot die back from the dead.

Episode 3

Dan is grateful for his death, since he gave him a hard time bringing "special guests" backstage to his van.

Season 0[edit | edit source]

A security guard employed in TFR.

Episode 2

Chastises Extra for not calling him for backup sooner.

Episode 5

After a pleasant dream with Reika, Date awakens to the coldness of reality after incessant nagging from Aiba, and finds himself in an underground prison cell along with a still sleeping Chris Redfield. Beyond the cell gate he can spot the entrance blocked by a boulder. While looking around, the figure of Security Guard Joe approaches, and tells him that this place belongs to very powerful people, but instead of listening, Date has Aiba run her simulations, which agitates Joe and makes him taunt that this place is a secret smuggling ring and shows Date a copy of the goods no one has access to. Aiba concentrates Date's vision on the guard's hand, identifying a limited edition porno mag, and he grabs him through the cell bars, forcefully hitting him trying to get him to drop the mag. The vibrations cause the boulder's support to break loose, and start rolling towards the cell. Unable to free himself, the guard desperately slides the cell gate to the side, laughing that it was gonna crush his friend, but Chris' instincts flare up and, getting up with a scream, he destroys the boulder in one swift strike, all the while still being asleep. Joe faints from the shock, Date now able to get his so desired mag, when he notices a skeleton on the next cell and becomes aroused; Aiba restrains herself not to shock him and ups his dosage a bunch.

Episode 11

Impersonated by Stork.

The Extinct Light[edit | edit source]

Several security guard employed in Coolsville Hills.

Episode 3

While discussing recent news about how lame AEW sounds just like modern TFR and wishing BCW was brought back, a blood-curling scream cuts them off before a creature moving at terrifying speed blows them off into the walls. Even Stork who was disguised among the guards tries reiterating Coolsville Law Article 19 section 92 and calls his masked face uncool (unless for a good cause like peeping) yet is unable to do anything to slow him down. All of the guards are completely defenseless to stop this monster as he rushes through them in an animalistic motion, making its way into the tower.

Episode 5

Stork is recuperating in the hospital while being visited by a fellow Security Joe who had a day off during the incident. As Stork ends his recollection, he can't even describe what happened, in a second it was lights out. Joe sure was lucky, but Stork was too... the other security guards... well... if only they could be here to look at the revealing outfits the nurses wear.

Then... a mysterious visitor arrives, claiming "they" need to ask a few questions...

Episode 7

The sounds of alarms begin ringing in TFR's production truck and slowly spread, as security guards scramble to protect it and are authorized "force" to drive out the invaders, to complete ineffectiveness as nothing can stop Saten. He proclaims it's time to put the final nail in the "coffin" of this company, as the whole "world" sees live on TV! Sam Stone arrives right in time to inform Saten he made a serious mistake in pissing off such a well-paying group as The Board of Directors. But, this is a fight to the death, just "what" Saten was expecting in which Sam will not hold "anything" back.

After buying as much time as they could with a drawn-out tables match, soon enough... TFR has fallen.

Meanwhile, the whole guard of Coolsville Hills has fallen to The Black Knight's power and become Blackened. The heroes of light pass through them, but at the cusp of being overwhelmed, the clowns come to the rescue for some reason.

Off-Season 9: Rokkenjimania V[edit | edit source]

Robert Madman (or Robert Madrican), Joe Third and Joe Second defend from "The Sneed Busters".

Match History[edit | edit source]

Date Type Vs Result Records Singles Details
Security Guard ×3
W1 L0 1
1 0 P
Royal Rumble
Full List Lose Rokkenjimania II