From The Final Rumble Wiki
Jump to navigation Jump to search

The worst cooking posts and webms to be seen outside of /ck/. A Ja/ck/ thread is always something to be treasured.

Devil's Cook Ja/ck/[edit | edit source]

A man who has a legendary anti-talent for cooking, he still nonetheless wishes to someday be a great cook.

TFR/Season 2[edit | edit source]

To become a better cook he has to become stronger himself, and so when he discovered the King of the Ring Board Tournament, he decided to bring his culinary qualities to The Final Rumble by buying /biz/'s spot in equal parts money and BBQ bottles, and now aims to cook his way to victory. Literally. His cooking can kill people.

Episode 3

His cooking was too strong for no-taste asian punks.

Episode 5

Gives /v/ the definite proof why threads instantly become better when he is posted.

Episode 6

Reaching the finals against /a/'s representative Maximillion Pegasus, his cooking is ineffective against someone of such high taste.

TFR/Season 3[edit | edit source]

Acquiring new power

Now works as a cook backstage, which is the reason why most wrestlers avoid eating on-site and why the map has the kitchen marked with a skull.

Episode 5

Hears a Senator's call for "Jack" and shows up to answer the call, but his food is rejected.

TFR/Season 6[edit | edit source]

Protecting from his """FOOD"""

Even after the tragedy, his cooking has to be the worst thing on TFR

Episode 2

Fights Arthas to renew his chef contract.

Episode 4

During the rumbling, suffered a third and final stroke that paralyzed him, leaving him at the mercy of the tremors that upon reaching the peak killed him on the instant. It's a wonder he survived this long.

TFR/Season 0[edit | edit source]

A simple man that makes simple recipes in the most complex ways and as deadly as possible.

Has his own restaurant, somehow.

Episode 2

Someone posted a request on to deliver them one of Ja/ck/'s bento. Either a suicidally penitent man or a killer who enjoys the suffering of his victims.

TFR/Season 8[edit | edit source]

Ja/ck/ manages to keep running his restaurant despite all the strokes and the current state of Coolsville... but not for long.

Episode 1

Jack sends out a desperate message to his friend Kyle Hyde...

Kyle! I need your help, man! Someone is brutalizing my restaurant. It's a dangerous gangster! Can you come over, fast?!

Initially thinking Ja/ck/'s Dinner is being targeted by Mafia City, Kyle finds out it's instead a group called the "Blacklist Brotherhood", a small group who has nothing left to lose, and the man attacking is... Gene. Kyle couldn't believe it at first, but after being discarded by the industry, Gene says there's nothing left but stick to what you know and repay those who extend their hand. Kyle remarks that for "sticking to what he knows", he isn't seeing him getting pinned on the floor, which makes Gene happy since now he gets to kick "that asshole that cost a bunch of people their jobs" and his ass into the milky way. Surprisingly, Gene actually beats Kyle's ass, and for that makes a true promise to make his friend's life a living hell:

The two of you will never know peace again, as long as we rule over this place. All of us... We'll take turns beating you up and taking everything you have...

Kyle can't help but smile after that beatdown and say he can't wait to meet his friends, but Gene assures he'll regret saying that once they're done, and leaves.

With that out of the way, he orders some of Ja/ck/'s chicken.

Episode 2

Look out, Kyle! One of the leaders for the Blacklist Brotherhood brought his men to come after you!

And you know what they did?

They beat my friends black and blue, all because they said they might've seen you!

Please, is there anything you can do to help!?

The man attacking Ja/ck/'s now is Bolo Reynolds, who blames Kyle for forsaking Wright and driving him back to the thug life. Kyle gives it his all to not lose, but Bolo's might is simply too much. Ja/ck/'s finely-aged chicken, beef and cheddar are theirs for the taking. As a family, Bolo didn't just come because he wanted to cave his head in himself, but he came with backup from the B. Brotherhood as well. Kyle gets up and remarks people like them love to cheat, but Gene appears to remind him to watch his mouth; as a man of his word, he'll keep coming back again, and again, and again, and again, because he needs to further and constantly torture Kyle about how at fault he is... how alone he truly is; with a punch to the gut, he reminds him how many lives he derailed, how nobody will stand with a loser who ruined everything, and how his "Mystery Masters" are all gone now. If one think he thanks him for, is that the Blacklist Brotherhood would've never gotten so strong if not for the sheer anger, disappointment and frustration he made them channel into it, and then they leave to play poker.

Episode 4

Bolo and Gene are at it again, asking why their 'personal little bitch' keeps coming back, but he says they wouldn't understand what having a backbone is in a million years. They intent of taking him 2-on-1, but just then Narushima Koga arrives seeking to enter the 'restaurant only wrestlers are allowed in' that his master mentioned. He's disappointed when Gene says it's closed, but Kyle tells him they're just thugs shacking down the owner, Koga decides to join Kyle since he knows how those TikTok 2-on-1 fight videos go and to demonstrate his Coldsteel Style further.

Gene and Bolo stay on top a second time. Next time, they're gonna bring even more of the gang to have more fun, and the big guy that's coming won't let anyone bail him out. Sheesh... Koga's master didn't tell him how to stop holding back... but Kyle appreciates the backup, so Koga throws in if he gets some extra points for it, and Kyle sighs that of course not.

Episode 5

Kyle ignores his calls all day since his phone ran out of battery...

Episode 6

Gene and Bolo are there as always, and welcome Kyle after thinking for once he had 'gotten a clue' and abandoned the place, but Kyle doesn't care about the two bozos and ask for their third member. And to think Gene was feeling generous enough to have some mercy on him, if it's like that, then he calls out... Dan Schneider. The ground shakes as Dan comes to meet the man who ended their jobs and he begins screaming about feet as he goes mad into a berserk rage, Kyle suddenly feeling an unfathomable power surging from him. Just as Gene and Bolo are about to gang on him, Rean Schwarzer arrives from giving a nearby girl "private lessons", and decides to fulfill his promise to his student Koga. Since Dan is busy, thought, seems that he'll have to hold back on Gene and Bolo, haha... Dan screams even harder about feet as Kyle takes him on!

Almost impossible to believe... Kyle defeated Dan (powered down by him not being barefoot), and Rean thoroughly headpats Gene and Bolo, who decide to all retreat this once. Rean remarks Kyle is as strong as he heard from Koga, and even seems to be using a similar technique to "Coldsteel Style: Holding Back Kata"! Rean returns to his Coldsteel Dojo since he's late for his lessons. Ja/ck/ comes running out since Kyle finally drove back the Blacklist Brotherhood. With some high quality steak and drink, Kyle has plenty to tell him about a certain "Fortuna Nightmare"...

Episode 7

For once, Kyle arrives at Jack's without trouble in sight and gets to ask for a table, this time bringing along a kid from the developmental program in Chai. Suddenly, Ja/ck/ tells Kyle to wait a minute, just as Kyle gets a message... from Jack, who is right in front of him... and behind him appear the three delinquents he's used to dealing with, as Ja/ck/ explains he saw them coming in the distance and Kyle just tells him to get inside.

That's two in a row, even if Gene and Bolo think they're still ahead, that's twice they failed. Dan makes up that they just got caught off-guard, which Kyle nonchalantly likens to how he lied to the children in his van about his "free candy", but Dan digs his hole further by stating that he DID give them candy in exchange for feet pics... and collapses. Gene and Bolo start dragging him away due to "feetsies abstinence", and Bolo says he won't be so smug when they bring their leader, which Kyle likens to the "King of Pussies". For that, he tells Chai and their last minute ally Mechazawa that he'll be paying the bill from Jack's since they earned it, and Chai can't wait to eat the entire catalog to become a "More Awesomer" wrestler, while Kyle tells him to please not.

Feats[edit | edit source]

  • Surviving his own cooking
    • Surviving and willing to continue eating his own cooking (after 2 strokes)

Match History[edit | edit source]

Date Type Vs Result Record Singles Notes
Shoji Shingo Win
W1 L0 1
1 0 P
「King of the Boards Tournament」
/v/-tan Win
W2 L0 2
2 0 P
「King of the Boards Tournament」
Maximillion Pegasus Lose
W2 L1 1
2 1 P
「King of the Boards Tournament」
Ushiromiya Battler, Ja/ck/, Van Darkholme Win
Senator Armstrong Lose
W2 L2 0
2 2 P
Arthas Menethil Win
W3 L2 1
3 2 P
Tom Brady, Gun Jesus, Ja/ck/, Seeker Win Rokkenjimania II
Royal Rumble
Full List Lose Rokkenjimania III』– Rokkenjima Restoration Arc
For Title: NXT #1 Contender
No More Vidya

Ja/ck/ & Edward Richtofen

Lose TFR's 3rd Anniversary
For Title: Undisputed /v/ Tag-Team

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • Got his theme stolen (and put to better use) by Robert.