The Undercarder

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"There are few things that are truly badass. There's me, the Undertaker, the American Badass. There's the Hells Angels, MMMMMMMMMMM, don't wanna mess with them." ― Undercarder shilling for the XFL

The Undertaker is a dimeless anti-draw known to swoop down from the rafters to scare away viewers and plunge ratings into free fall. He has sporadically appeared in TFR, typically representing /asp/.


>Never the guy

>Never drew a dime
>Never had a good match before 2006 and even then was carried by vastly superior workers
>Never cut a memorable promo
>Never put anyone over
>Never had the balls to step out his WWF comfort even when Ted Turner threw millions at him
>Main evented the lowest drawing Wrestlemania of the '90s
>Main evented the lowest drawing Wrestlemania of the '10s
>Tanked the buyrate of King Of The Ring in 2002 so hard the PPV got cancelled
>Was barely ever in the main title picture because he was never a big enough deal
>Only the 2nd best member of The Brothers of Destruction
>Only the 4th best member of The Ministry
>Only the 8th best member of The Corporate Ministry
>His backstage clique "The Bone Street Krew" was utterly BTFO by The Kliq and achieved nothing notable except inflicting Savio Vega on us
>His biker cosplay was cringeworthy
>His MMA cosplay was cringeworthy
>Unironically calls himself """"""""DA BEST PURE STRIKER IN DA WWE""""""""
>Shit taste in whiskey (this one is actually 100% true, JD is awful)
>Shit hairline
>Has his ex wife's name tattooed on his neck
>Failed at his first marriage so badly that he resorted to marrying an anorexic bimbo
>Only significant achievement was accidentally being booked to have a Wrestlemania streak
>Is the wrestling equivalent of that one insufferably mediocre middle manager whose sole professional """""""achievement"""""" is staying in the same shitty job for 25 years
>Drew so poorly in his 1997 title run that Bret Hart of all people had to take the belt off him
>spent the latter part of his career burying superior young talent

>The biggest impact he had on the business was sitting around in the back and telling one of his no-draw buddies to job to someone who could actually draw a dime

Season 1[edit | edit source]

Joins TFR to show the newest hotdog fed what a mmmmighty real baddass match looks like and to steal some dimes from matches of better wrestlers along the way.

Episode 6

Put in a match with a bunch of kids who haven't learnt of his badass story yet. Mmmmmanagement won't hear the end of this one.

Episode 7

Challenges Fred to see who the most mmmmmmmysterious one is.

Season 3[edit | edit source]

Goes back backstage for a while to enact his 27th retirement until he feels like it.

Episode 6

Mmmm. A stunning showcase of The Undercarder's potent and incredibly deadly pure strikes, and the most dimes match ever witnessed in front of a full and overpacked auditorium of ghosts. Also Nash ran off crying afterwards.

Season 4[edit | edit source]

Works for Mr. Bones because "he's one badass dude, wouldn't wanna mess with them" and has nothing better to do while down in Hell.

The Extra OVA[edit | edit source]

Was challenged by Tre trespassing into his domain. Not only did he get his Urn stolen, Tre beat him live on the WWE stage and sent him back to hell in a Last Ride Match.

Episode 2

Appearing in Hell on a bike made of dimes he siphoned from other opponents, the American Badass scored a win against Bane via The Last Ride and stole his soul. Now that's how to start a badass weekend, baby.

Season 5[edit | edit source]

He was trying to shimmy his way into what he thought was a mmmmmighty badass conference nobody told him about, when he managed to sneak in, he was trapped in the DEATH GAME.

Episode 1

He was selected for the non-candidate Death Rumble where the first 10 eliminated die and the winner and highest killer wins Immunity.

Undertaker survived.

Episode 2

He was put in a 8-man battle to get Immunity×2 weeks.

Armstrong won the Immunity.

Undertaker is placed in the Main Vote, receiving 4 votes. Via Majority Vote, Big Show, Louis, V, Mastema, and Soldier G65434-2 are sentenced to the wild ride.

Episode 4

Pitted against Mr. America for the theme of "friendship".

Mr. America wins the Immunity.

Gets to play a special card game game before the match, and draws the Nothing card.

Undertaker is placed in the Main Vote, receiving 1 votes. A tie-breaker is held. Via Minority Vote, Doomguy, Reviewbrah ...and himself are sentenced to the wild ride.

Episode 8

Returns along with Big Show as Dolls.

Episode 10

Along with all the other Dolls, gets blown up by La Parka's modifications once the Death Game reaches its final stage.

Season 6[edit | edit source]

Despite the death of the deadman, not many cared about it. As expected considering how many retirements he's had as of yet.

Episode 2

What is dead can never die, as he's back from Hell now donning the style of some guy on a mad conquest he found and beat down there. He also has a demmmmmmonic harem that he had to leave there.

Episode 4

He joins with Duke on BANS Army's assault and their intent to take over TFR.

After Rando manages to defeat The Minotaur, they move in for the kill on the weakened warrior, but Mitake Miyao shows up to aid him.

Though they are defeated, they are far too tired and Carder & Duke try to finish Miyao, but first they try to take off Rando's mask.

As he is unmasked, Broken Man kills Carder (again) and knocks-out Duke.

Episode 9[edit | edit source]

Spending 12 years in hell, the deadman has lost even more humanity (and dimes) and become the fiend known as Hellbiker.

When The Final Resistance's team invades The Factory, he takes Suou Tatsuya to his fiend domain, Wrestler's Court, and faces him. He is defeated and Suou is sent back, but as a last trick, Hellbiker sends him near the presence of The Circus.

Episode 15[edit | edit source]

Escapes from Hell to join one last time with his baddass chaotic buddies in Coolsville.

Season 0[edit | edit source]

Dead Dimes Walking.

While not wrestling, he serves as the Judge on Wrestler's Court, the courtroom for all matters wrestling.

Episode 14

Court is now in session, presided by The MMMighty Judge, using the badass fast-paced initial trial system because he has a meeting with his biker friends. Vitalik asks from the Witness Stand to wait while his defense makes its way late, making Wright wonder if he has something up his sleeve... and indeed, he shocks everyone as he has hired the legendary undefeated defense attorney: Lawyer 47, who apologized for the lateness as some RED-HAIRED FAGGOT got his suit dirty.

The prosecution makes their opening statement: Vitalik has mismanaged the company from health issues to match fixing, and presents evidence proving the connection between TFR staff and the late Chuck's Suck & Fuck; 47 quickly discards it on the basis that "it cannot be read because reading is for homos", a formidable move that the Judge allows while looking uninterested and all of Sminem's team acknowledges as a difficult challenge. Next, the defense makes a statement of their own, "all of the prosecution's evidence is fake and gay, fabricated even, and no real evidence will be heard against his client as Vitalik and TFR have done literally nothing wrong, and Chuck's is a gay den of lies."

Edgeworth presents a decisive piece of evidence—a photo proving a match which had a different outcome than officially acknowledged after the lights of the arena suddenly turn off (that's ground for gimmmmmick infringemmmmmmment). But unluckily 47's glasses are too fucking blurry to see anything and he rips the image in half. Also, 47 would like to add one thing: no hat-wearing attorneys have been left mentally retarded due to TFR as they employ the amazing Dr. Piccolo, or at least that would be if he wasn't such a fucking traitor like the rest of the people in this room.

Exhibit GAYYYY: Kyle Hyde. All those mysteries solved and yet no one can find out why you suck so much.

Tell me, does the paper clip represent your penis size, or is it a metaphor for how you can barely keep anything together.

Saihara? Amima? Who? So many Danganronpa shitters here I can't even keep track of them all.

Who's running the billing here, a monkey, or a teenage girl?

And Janny? Janny!? JANNY!?

And the prosecution? The prosecution? Heh. Who gives a shit about the prosecution, we all know they're gonna lose anyway.

They're both foolish fools who are too foolish to know that they have been fooled. They are the poison that is rotting TFR from within.

Sminem's team hangs on to the last string of hope after such demolishing defense...

At last, the prosecution presents its most finishing piece of evidence, years upon years of company records that help detail Vitalik's scheme with other parties such as the mafia and even the president, gathered by a staff member risking his own well-being—Amami Rantaro. It picks the judge's interest but hears the defense's rebuttal first: Zzzzsnore. The decision is clear and the evidence doesn't change anything, disappointing Piccolo, Janny, and Amami, as they've met with a move worthy of an Ultimate Lawyer.

With time at its limit, Edgeworth desperately looks for the missing piece to the puzzle that is such an impenetrable defense. his assistant Therapist affirms he must be on the right track, the defense's posture can only mean one thing, and that's that it's bluffing. If he can pinpoint his confidence's source, he can defeat it, and that's when Edgeworth notices it by using his father's glasses, his achilles' heel: his perfect bald. By distracting the judge by way of retreading on his father's lengthy medical records, he also annoys the defense into going into a rant, and uses the opportunity to steal Payne's wig and throw it onto 47's head; instantly, his focus, confidence and charisma are crushed before he can stop talking.

Because, like the legend he is, the Judge...





That's why... That's why I declare this case closed!

Law degrees are a sham anyway, get a real degree like fine arts.

Or at least be a cop so you can carry a gun and look cool. You'd be surprised how many are like th-

A pure strike is delivered, and the judge finally sees through the defense's lies, sentencing the attorney to wrestler's court after the trial is over. In light of these events, the verdict is set, and the court declares TheFinalRumble... G U I L T Y. But Vitalik's conviction would come with a price, as TFR is closed down... for a while at least, until the place is confirmed free of corruption (and delivers 100000 bottles of jack to court). Additionally, the TFR title will be permanently retired, as well as all other titles vacated, but it was all a calculated part of the risk; as Sminem puts it, roster members will leave for indies or maybe nowhere and budget will go down, but wrestling will survive, and they'll be back sooner than they know it... with the trial over, all that's left is looking ahead.

TFR/Season 7[edit | edit source]

Drinks jack while watching his favorite wrestler, HUNK.

Episode 2/TFR[edit | edit source]

When Leon S. Kennedy appears in a strange Hinamizawa from the vents, the strange figure of Tomitaker, the guardian deity, appears to repel the stranger from the town.

Match History[edit | edit source]

Date Type Vs Result Records Singles Details
Battle Royale Shingo Shoji, Vitalik, Spiderman, Erwin Smith, Fred Jones, Leon Kennedy, Chad, The Undercarder Lose
W0 L1 -1
0 0 P
Extreme Rules Fred Jones
W0 L2 -2
0 1 P
W0 L1 -1
0 1 P
Time Limit
Hank Wimbleton, Ico, Johnny Knoxville, Battler, Undertaker, Richtofen NC Game: WWE SmackDown! Hhere Comes the Pain

Stage: Times Square Brawl

Note: Only Ico and Hank were actually fighting, Battler was building up speed in a corner and the rest were rolling around in gay baby jail corner.

Win Game: WWE SmackDown! Here Comes the Pain

Stage: Storage Brawl

Note: Undertaker was the only one to pin.

Kevin Nash Win
W1 L2 -1
1 1 P
W1 L1 0
1 1 P
Royal Rumble
Full List
Lose Game: WWE Smackdown! Here Comes the Pain
Full List
Game: WWE SmackDown! vs. RAW 2006
Bane Win
W2 L2 0
2 1 P
W2 L1 1
2 1 P
Note: Perfect sync with the song "Smell of the Game" as it says "That is bullshit blazing" just when Carder pinned.
Royal Rumble
Entry Order
  1. Battler Ushiromiya
  2. Shingo Shoji
  3. Edward Richtofen (Ultimis)
  4. Rage Guy
  5. G-Man
  6. Mean Mark Calloway
  7. Rance
  8. Adam Jensen
  9. Archer
  10. Chosen Hunter
  11. Tatsuya Suou
  12. Louis
  13. Albert Wesker
  14. Rando
  15. Osama Bin Laden
  16. Vergil
  17. Van Darkholme
  18. Doctor Piccolo
  19. DELTA
  20. Arthur Morgan
Lose Game: WWE 2K19
  1. Steve Burnside
  2. Black Ref
  3. Vorgin
  4. Kirei Kotomine
  5. Sebastian LaCroix
  6. Ricardo Milos
  7. Big Show
  8. Chuck
  9. Raidou Kuzunoha
  10. Mrs. X
  11. Eric Sparrow
  12. HANK
  13. Richtofen
  14. Albert Wesker
  15. Donte
  16. Sneed
  17. Van Darkholme
  18. Doomguy
  19. Arkantos
  20. Arthur Morgan
  21. Mark Wolff
  22. CJ
  23. Aniki
  24. Agent 47
  25. Chris Benoit
  26. Tommy Wiseau
  27. Hank Wimbleton
  28. Johnny Knoxville
  29. The Undertaker
  30. Battler Ushiromiya
Christmas Special
Game: WWE Smackdown! Here comes the Pain
  1. Leon S. Kennedy
  2. Maximillion Pegasus
  3. Louis
  4. Michael Jordan
  5. Zombie Benoit
  6. Erwin Smith
  7. Garcian Smith
  8. Undertaker's Druid
  9. Christine
  10. Max Payne
  11. Chris Redfield
  12. Edward Richtofen (Ultimis)
  13. Manny Pardo
  14. Jonathan
  15. Johnny Klebitz
  16. Andrei Ulmeyda
  17. The Undercarder
  18. Cole MacGrath
  19. Balthios James
  20. Battler Ushiromiya
  21. Alex Mercer
  22. Yosuke
  23. Albert Wesker
  24. Goro Majima
  25. Walter
  26. Dutch Van Der Linde
  27. Edward Richtofen (Primis)
  28. Doomguy
  29. Fred Jones
  30. Arthur Morgan
Christmas Special
Game: WWE SmackDown vs RAW 2011
Royal Rumble
  1. Max Stirner
  2. Human Holocaust
  3. Dr. Salvador
  4. Postal Dude
  5. Winnie the Pooh
  6. Brad Pitt
  7. Sam Hyde
  8. Old Man Henderson
  9. ZUN
  10. MC Ride
  11. SANS
  12. Soldier G65434-2
  13. Carter
  14. Undertaker
  15. Reviewbrah
  16. Tony Hawk
  17. Andrei Ulmeyda
  18. James Sunderland
  19. Mr. X
  20. Big Show
Dead Death Rumble
Elimination №16
Ladder Char Aznable, Doomguy, Kiryu Kazuma, Senator Armstrong, V, Mr. X, Soldier G65434-2, Undertaker Lose
W2 L3 -1
2 1 P
Immunity Ladder
Mr. America Lose
W2 L4 -2
2 2 P
W2 L2 0
2 2 P
Friendship Match
For: Immunity×1
Tag-Team Kiryu Kazuma & Majima Goro

Doll Undertaker & Doll Big Show

W2 L5 -3
2 ~3 P
Dolls Match
As: Doll

For: Immunity×1

Elimination Chamber Nero, Demi-fiend, Kasuga Ichiban, Hellcarder, Dan Schneider, Punished Yu Lose
W2 L6 -4
3 ~4 P
As: Hellcarder

For Title: King of Jobbers #1 Contender

Alucard, Boomer, Serge, Kazuhira Miller, Robert, Pixy, Hellcarder, Edward Richtofen Lose
W2 L7 -5
3 ~5 P
As: Hellcarder

Note: MITB qualifier.

Rando & Mitake Miyao

Hellcarder & Duke Nukem

W2 L8 -6
3 ~5 P
As: Hellcarder
Suou Tatsuya Lose
W2 L9 -7
3 ~6 P
W2 L3 -1
2 3 P
As: Hellbiker
Steel Cage
Hell Biker, Rando, Aleph, Red Lose As: Hellbiker

Note: simps

NON-CANON Mario Win As: Hellbiker

Note: Mario feel pity of Undercarder and let himself lose.

30-Man Royal Rumble
  1. Gene
  2. The Undertaker
  3. Goldberg
  4. Shawn Michaels
  5. Steve Austin
  6. Aleph
  7. Rean Schwarzer
  8. Suou Tatsuya
  9. Eddie Guerrero
  10. Joshua Graham
  11. Aniki
  12. Johnny Gat
  13. Chris Jericho
  14. Maebara Keiichi
  15. Komaeda Nagito
  16. Kurt Angle
  17. Narushima Koga
  18. Dimitri Blaiddyd
  19. R-Truth
  20. Cam On Ingurland
  21. Rance
  22. Drew McIntyre
  23. Kevin Nash
  24. Ric Flair
  25. Samoa Joe
  26. Bevi
  27. Seth Rollins
  28. Ooishi Kuraudo
  29. Triple H
  30. Fred Jones
Lose Elimination №: 7
30-Man Royal Rumble
  1. Mario
  2. Galo
  3. Balthios James
  4. Fred Jones
  5. Dr. Piccolo
  6. Raiden
  7. Rance
  8. Bevi
  9. Fat Albert
  10. Geralt of Rivia
  11. Joshua Graham
  12. CJ
  13. Tyrone Ngubu
  14. Gene
  15. Dimitri Blaiddyd
  16. Demaro
  17. Aniki
  18. Roger Retinz
  19. Narushima Jakob
  20. Albus Bernstein
  21. Rean Schwarzer
  22. Narushima Koga
  23. Sandro
  24. Zoomer
  25. Kazuhira Miller
  26. Matador
  27. Van Darkholme
  28. Hell Biker
  29. Boomer
  30. Arthas Menethil
W2 L10 -8
3 ~6 P
As: Hell Biker

For Title: /v/ #1 Contender

Elimination №2

Royal Rumble
Full List
Lose Rokkenjimania II
As: Hellbiker
2/3 Falls
Champion Kuzunoha Raidou (0-2) Win Rokkenjimania II
For Title: /v/
Royal Rumble
S6E15.5§#The Rokkenjima Rumble - Prelude to The Golden Land
Full List
Lose Rokkenjimania II
As: Hellcarder
Leon S. Kennedy Win
W3 L10 -7
4 ~6 P
W3 L3 0
3 3 P
As: Tomitaker
NON-CANON Ushiromiya Battler, Agent 47, Triple H '98

HUNK, Rakesh Kumar Orton, Undercarder '00

Lose Game: 2K18

Note: Battler did a cool never before seen ladder sprint drop on HUNK.

Spazz Maticus Win 「Spazz Wrestle Training Arc」
Note: Spazz paid the mmmmmmmmmm price

There's few beings who are truly baddass, there's Battler Ushiromiya, mmmmm wouldn't wanna mess with him.

Royal Rumble
Full List
Lose Rokkenjimania III』– Past Rumble Arc
Game: WWE Smackdown! Here comes the Pain
Full List
Win Rokkenjimania III』– Electric Rumble Boogaloo Arc
Game: WWE Wrestlemania XIX
Extreme Rules
Higurashi Haruto
HUNK & The Undercarder
Win Rokkenjimania III』– Zoomer Arc
Royal Rumble
Full List
Lose Rokkenjimania III』– The Final Arc
NON-CANON Kaidou Shun Lose Game: WWE 2K22
The American Badass, The Dead Man, The Undertaker, The Phantom, Saihara Shuichi, Lord of Darkness Win/


Rokkenjimania IV』– Chair Arc
Royal Rumble
Full List
Lose Rokkenjimania IV』– Return From The Past Arc
Game: WWE SmackDown vs. Raw 2006
NON-CANON Ric Flair Lose Support: Kane (The Brothers of Destruction)

History - Extra OVA[edit | edit source]

Extra OVA
Type Vs Result Details
Tre Lose Stage: The Underworld

Tre stole his Urn.

Last Ride Match Lose

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • Holy shit he knew about Chris Benoit's suicide all along

  • In S6, the real Helltaker was supposed to show up and beat him for stealing his outfit, but it ended scrapped.

Gallery[edit | edit source]