Max Payne

Max Payne ( AKA Max, Max Jobber, Max Paynis, Payne in the Butt and Mr Rhetorical Question) is the main character from the eponymous franchise.

A Bit Closer to Heaven
Once an high ranking cop, Max transferred after having his family brutally murdered by junkies.

Season 1
Now, Payne has been sent on an undercover mission to TFR to find out who has really killed his family. As such, he's an independent wrestler that sides with neither Team NWF and Team FMS. He has grown a reputation of enduring long battles and losing near the end of it, something that has taken a toll on his sanity.

Episode 2

Debuts in a match with fellow cop Marvin Branagh and agents like HUNK and Agent 47

Episode 3

Teams up with Agent 47 in the tournament for some reason.

Episode 5

Fights Dutch van der Linde thinking his plan might has something to do with his family.

Episode 6

Fights Agent 47 for the first time in HIAC but wards off the assassin. Why have they fought after they teamed up?

Season 2
Episode 1

Was assaulted by Agent 47.

Episode 2

Attacked again by 47 and clinging to dear life.

Episode 3

Brutally attacked by 47 in the middle of his entrance with a sledge hammer and considered dead.

After being assaulted by AK47 at the start of a match, Payne suffered grave damage and was considered dead. He would reappear later as a last confrontation with 47, but some say he was already dead, a hollow husk seeking vengeance. He finally met his end in season 2 after 47 assassinated him in the ring during a last man standing match.

Episode 6

In the middle of the match between 47 and Battler, none other than Max Payne, now bald and wearing brazilian clothes, runs in to attack Battler. However, even this has no effect as Battler still manages to beat 47, who is now dazzled by being defeated twice by such an unimpressive looking opponent.

Episode 7
It turns out, Payne wasn't really killed by 47, but was merely pretending to fill out the contract and was having a vacation in brazil. In reality, they are good friends, and their real objective is Battler Ushiromiya.

The cause of this is that he once cornered 47 during a police investigation, and he offered Payne a chance to meet the murderers of his family and enact revenge. Ever since they have been friends, and when his contract told him to kill his best friend, he simply couldn't do it.

Episode 8

47 took the mental warfare to the next level, decided to create a phrase that would rival Battler's BCW, he wore a hat that said BIG, for "Battler Is Gay", and had prepared an all new speech.

He had Max fight him this time, but not even this could stop him.

Episode 8.5

In some alleyway, a battered Man and an Assassin lay down, defeated once again. They failed another contract to defeat their target. How could we fail? We are the best Assassin and Vigilante, forming a Tag Team group. That should cover all of each other's weaknesses. It's all the fault of that bloody haired Japanese man, we should have been able to kill him and fulfill our contract. Weren't we good enough? We always terminated our targets up until this point. Maybe this isn't our thing anymore. But what do we do then? Nowhere to go... I... don't know. Another contract, if we can pull another job we should be back in the game, and we won't fail next time. Yeah...

Season 3
During the Dimensional Merge, Payne recovered his hair.

Episode 3

47 thus decided to send a video to Battler while Payne records; bragging about his free time with his championship and mocking his defeat at the hands of Darkholme. He mentions that next week some losers will fight to determine who is next on his list, but such easy contracts are boring, and even him would put more of a fight.

Episode 6

Max decided to enter "Battler's" room to teach him a lesson to about beating his friend 47, but it seems it was actually a trap for him set by "Battler" and now he's missing.

Episode 9

In reality, it was all part of 47's plan, so he could attack the wrestlers backstage while pretending to be dead and claim it was Black Battler.

Season 4
He and 47 are now celebrating that FAGGLER is out of commision at last, not even caring to wrestle that much now that he's out.

Episode 1

Max and 47 go to a fancy restaurant, and although he hasn't heard back from whoever put the contract up, that's not what matters now that Faggler's done.

He's not sure who he'll be his next contract, but he's sure it'll be something worthwhile.

Episode 2-3

They set to defeat a rival assassin team, Killer2, but they were unsuccessful

Episode 11

When Kojima reveals his plan, they end up in the Universe 2K20, safe from The Final Impact do to Kojima's interest in them

Season 5
Along with Agent 47, he went to a special conference about wrestling after the Kojima Incident, and was trapped in the in Universe 2K20 by La Parka.

Episode 1

He was selected for the non-candidate where the first 10 eliminated  and the winner and highest killer wins .

Now that Max is dead, there's nothing to keep Agent 47 from going full schizo.

Episode 12
In the good ending, Max Payne is one of the wrestlers who welcome Battler to The Golden Land.

Season 0
An ex-cop who takes painkillers and is looking for a few fights, nothing more than that. Has no relationships with any bald assassins.

Episode 2

Becomes contender for the King of Jobbers title with a lucky pin against Kirei. Perhaps his luck might change.

Episode 3

And it did, as he beat another jobber for the kings of jobbers title.

Episode 5

Despite Jayden's loss, they both put up a great match and Payne retains.

Episode 7

But he lost the title to a red swordsman.

Episode 14
Court is now in session, presided by The MMMighty Judge, using the badass fast-paced initial trial system because he has a meeting with his biker friends. Vitalik asks from the Witness Stand to wait while his defense makes its way late, making Wright wonder if he has something up his sleeve... and indeed, he shocks everyone as he has hired the legendary undefeated defense attorney: Lawyer 47 (and his onlooker, Payne), who apologized for the lateness as some RED-HAIRED FAGGOT got his suit dirty.

The prosecution makes their opening statement: Vitalik has mismanaged the company from health issues to match fixing, and presents evidence proving the connection between TFR staff and the late Chuck's Suck & Fuck; 47 quickly discards it on the basis that "it cannot be read because reading is for homos", a formidable move that the Judge allows while looking uninterested and all of Sminem's team acknowledges as a difficult challenge. Next, the defense makes a statement of their own, "all of the prosecution's evidence is fake and gay, fabricated even, and no real evidence will be heard against his client as Vitalik and TFR have done literally nothing wrong, and Chuck's is a gay den of lies."

Edgeworth presents a decisive piece of evidence—a photo proving a match which had a different outcome than officially acknowledged after the lights of the arena suddenly turn off (that's ground for gimmmmmick infringemmmmmmment). But unluckily 47's glasses are too fucking blurry to see anything and he rips the image in half. Also, 47 would like to add one thing: no hat-wearing attorneys have been left mentally retarded due to TFR as they employ the amazing Dr. Piccolo, or at least that would be if he wasn't such a fucking traitor like the rest of the people in this room. Exhibit GAYYYY: Kyle Hyde. All those mysteries solved and yet no one can find out why you suck so much.

Tell me, does the paper clip represent your penis size, or is it a metaphor for how you can barely keep anything together.

Saihara? Amima? Who? So many Danganronpa shitters here I can't even keep track of them all.

Who's running the billing here, a monkey, or a teenage girl?

And Janny? Janny!? JANNY!?

And the prosecution? The prosecution? Heh. Who gives a shit about the prosecution, we all know they're gonna lose anyway.

They're both foolish fools who are too foolish to know that they have been fooled. They are the poison that is rotting TFR from within. Sminem's team hangs on to the last string of hope after such demolishing defense...

At last, the prosecution presents its most finishing piece of evidence, years upon years of company records that help detail Vitalik's scheme with other parties such as the mafia and even the president, gathered by a staff member risking his own well-being—Amami Rantaro. It picks the judge's interest but hears the defense's rebuttal first: Zzzzsnore. The decision is clear and the evidence doesn't change anything, disappointing Piccolo, Janny, and Amami, as they've met with a move worthy of an Ultimate Lawyer.

With time at its limit, Edgeworth desperately looks for the missing piece to the puzzle that is such an impenetrable defense. his assistant Therapist affirms he must be on the right track, the defense's posture can only mean one thing, and that's that it's bluffing. If he can pinpoint his confidence's source, he can defeat it, and that's when Edgeworth notices it by using his father's glasses, his achilles' heel: his perfect bald. By distracting the judge by way of retreading on his father's lengthy medical records, he also annoys the defense into going into a rant, and uses the opportunity to steal Payne's wig and throw it onto 47's head; instantly, his focus, confidence and charisma are crushed before he can stop talking. Because, like the legend he is, the Judge...

Judge NEVER DREW A DIME!

HE NEVER PASSED THE BAR! HE'S NEVER EATEN CHICAGO STYLE PIZZA!

HE ONLY EXISTS TO TAKE BRIBES AND WHACK HIS GAVEL! HIS GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT IS BEING ABLE TO SUCK DICKS BEHIND THE DUMPSTER AT WENDY'S AND NOT GET CAUGHT!

IT IS TRULY A SAD DAY WHEN A PARODY OF A HUMAN BEING CAN BE CALLED A "JUDGE". DARE I SAY, THE DARK AGE OF THE LAW IS ALREADY HERE.

That's why... That's why I declare this case closed!

Law degrees are a sham anyway, get a real degree like fine arts.

Or at least be a cop so you can carry a gun and look cool. You'd be surprised how many are like th- A pure strike is delivered, and the judge finally sees through the defense's lies, sentencing the attorney to wrestler's court after the trial is over. In light of these events, the verdict is set, and the court declares TheFinalRumble... GUILTY.

Season 7
Formerly a cop, now a bald friend with an assassin.

Episode 1

Debuts in a tables match against a bunch of lowlifes.

Episode 3

Has a match against another cop for information, but beats him.

Episode 5

Fights some crazy yakuza guy.

Episode 7

Fights some emo twink and loses, not making it into the tournament

Episode 8

Has a last chance but loses again.

Off-Season 8
Episode 2 47: ''Agent 47. My name is Agent 47, and I am a certified D. D for Dickest BIG, and you can't. Beat. That.'' ''And this right here is biiig Max, the Maxerino is here. And you can't. Beat. That.'' Badda Boom, Badda Bing, fucking Battler is a pig. Max: ''There's only ONE WORD to DESCRIBE THEM, and I'm gonna SPELL. IT. OUT for them.''

F-A-G-G-O-T! Episode 25

Paynerino teams up with some punk because what else does he have left to lose, and surprisingly snatch a chance at the team titles.

Feats

 * Survived to the last 2 participants in MDickie's Wrestling MPire - Royal Rumble while having only one leg to stand on and a missing eye and arm.
 * Put up a good fight against all of his opponents who have defeated him.
 * Won the heart of many.
 *  HE'S FUCKING DEAD 
 *  NOT DEAD NOT DEAD 
 *  BLACK BATTLER KILLED HIM NOW HE'S DEAD AGAIN 
 *  FUCK HE WASN'T AGAIN 
 * HE'S ACTUALLY DEAD FOR REAL LA PARKA KILLED HIM IN THE DEATH GAME AND 47 WENT SCHIZO
 * Now he's back but 47 doesn't remember the heckin maxerino.

Trivia

 * OH NO NO NO PLEASE DON'T ENTER BATTLER NEGROS ROOM PAYNE DON'T
 * OH NO NO NO PLEASE DON'T JOB IN LA PARKA'S DEATH RUMBLE PAYNE DON'T
 * NOT THE HECKIN MAXERINO